TBD on Ning
My Police Story
I got the call at 3 a.m.--another murder. When I arrived the boys in blue had already roped off the crime scene. The Bag and Tag team was standing by waiting for us to give the word so they could bag the body and deliver it to the morgue. My partner, a newbie, had begun placing evidence markers for the photographer. He was running around like a pointer pup trying to lock down the scent of a well-hidden pheasant.
I took a drink of my double shot, venti, hazelnut latte--no foam and winced but what can you expect from an all-night drive through coffee shop operated by a nineteen year old drop out with inch-wide holes in his ear lobes and a tattoo that says "you suck" on his forehead. Stepping over the police tape barrier I walked up to the blood soaked body, careful not to disturb my partner's evidence markers. He saw me and ran over and gave a run down on what he'd already done to help us solve the crime.
"This is going to be a tough one," he said. "No witnesses, no wallet or ID so we don't know who he is or why he had to die. I told the uniformed cops to be on the lookout for bullet casings and I told the Bag and Tag team that this one is a high priority so the moment they finish their autopsy they'll send the report over so we'll at least know the cause of death."
I looked down at the huge hunting knife embedded deep in the dead man's chest and took another drink of my coffee.
It was going to be a long night!
I took a drink of my double shot, venti, hazelnut latte--no foam and winced but what can you expect from an all-night drive through coffee shop operated by a nineteen year old drop out with inch-wide holes in his ear lobes and a tattoo that says "you suck" on his forehead. Stepping over the police tape barrier I walked up to the blood soaked body, careful not to disturb my partner's evidence markers. He saw me and ran over and gave a run down on what he'd already done to help us solve the crime.
"This is going to be a tough one," he said. "No witnesses, no wallet or ID so we don't know who he is or why he had to die. I told the uniformed cops to be on the lookout for bullet casings and I told the Bag and Tag team that this one is a high priority so the moment they finish their autopsy they'll send the report over so we'll at least know the cause of death."
I looked down at the huge hunting knife embedded deep in the dead man's chest and took another drink of my coffee.
It was going to be a long night!
Tags: humor
Views: 15
Replies to This Discussion
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Permalink Reply by Lobo on
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LOL. I hope the guy was just trying to be funny. One time I was sitting in a room with two other new hires while the company spokesperson gave us the EEO/Sexual Harassment lecture. At the end of her lecture she asked if any of us had any questions. One of the new-hires raised his hand and she kindly asked him what his question was. He answered, "Where can I go to get sexually harassed?"
He thought it was funny. She didn't.
I don't think he lasted too long in that company. -
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Permalink Reply by Directionally Challenged on
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Here's my true police story:
Several years ago, at the beginning of football season, I took my daughter to our local football field to get her cheerleading uniform. Unfortunately we couldn't get into the parking lot. A police car was blocking the entrance and two officers were talking to a couple of people. I don't know exactly what happened, but there was a Dunkin Donut box lying upside-down on the pavement and two dozen donuts scattered around. Oh, the irony of it! -
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Permalink Reply by stillgoing on
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I don't have a police story.....because I'm someone else. But that other guy has a lot.
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