ok here's the question .. would you or wouldn't you ??

[frenchy]

well i finally decided to subscribe to netflix . seems i'm not the only one they just set some kinda bandwidth record for the amount of movies they stream in a day .. like i said in another post it is the future of tv .. so anyway the first movie i watched was eternal sunshine of the spotless mind with jim carey .. now if you haven't seen it you're probably thinkin oh shit another mindless talkin outta his ass jim carey movie .. but nope .. its nothin like that .. its the best actin i ever saw him do , but i'm not surprised .. if you can do comedy you can usually do heavy drama .. i think comedy is harder .. look at robin williams . he did good will hunting and awakenings and was brilliant in both of em .. so anyway the premise of this movie is that if you are in too much pain from a breakup you can simply have them erased from your memory .. no more memories no more pain .. so .. would you ?? or wouldn't you have someone scrubbed from your brain if they broke your heart really bad ?? or would you simply tough it out even tho you were absolutely miserable ? and i mean miserable ?? 

[crestofwaves]

Oh, Honestly, I could never scrub someone from my brain. There's always a time that things were good, and I wouldn't want that scrubbed. Plus, when a relationship ends, for one person to think he or she had nothing to do with it is a little naïve, no?  There was something wrong somewhere along the line.  Even if it was just a red flag that went up before the relationship got intense that somebody ignored.

 

Maybe for addicts this would be a good thing. They could have scrubbed from their brain the way they felt when they got high, or even the fact that they got high and recovery would be easier.

 

When I watched this movie, I coulnd not get into it. There was too much noise in his head.  I have ADD.  My head is like that all the time.  This movie just pushed that button.  My son and daughter told me I wasn't cool enough to like it just like I didn't like On Being John Malkovich.

[Karin M Fichtner]

Well, French, that's a really tough question.  I definitely would not wish to erase my first husband. He gave me four beautiful kids who are the joy of my life. And I have more good memories of #2 than bad.  But I would be tempted to erase the last marriage from my memory.....except for one thing. He was a huge help to me when my parents were dying.  I owe him a debt of gratitude for that. (I just got through chatting with him on FB; it's his birthday, and I wished him a good one)

So.....I guess my answer is no.  No matter how much pain I've dealt with and how much loss......the good memories tend to overshadow the bad, and I would lose those, too, if I erased all the memory of that particular episode in my life. I'll take the bad with the good, I guess.  Besides......the pain only served to make me stronger.

[ProblemAgain]

if you scrub the bad parts from your life, you are a different person because the person you are is the sum total of all your experiences....i'll stick with with the cards i was dealt and that i've played. take the good and the bad together..and even painful exes are included

[Lifesighs]

It would be very tempting to scrub one person, not any memories that I want to hold onto with him however it was a huge lesson learned. I needed that lesson so no way.

I think that what you're asking about is if someone you really loved left you, that kind of hurting. I still wouldn't scrub there must be wonderful memories it that relationship.

[Wayne Goodwin]

I'm happy with what memories i have left ...

[Shadowman]

Suppose both you and the person that made you miserable both had your memories wiped. Would that not put you in danger of doing the same thing all over again? Albeit some people seem to do this even with their memory intact. Reminds me of the Total Recall movie.

[frenchy]

good point shadow .. very good point .. and if you see the movie its kinda like that .. almost .. but i don't wanna give too much of it away just yet for those that didn't see it ..  

[Mickchick]

I have been absolutely miserable from a break up and it took time to get over it, but I wouldn't erase the person or the feelings from my mind.  There was a lot of good memories, too, and I (hope) I learned something from those breakups.  I know they absolutely made me stronger, and contribute to the person I am today (for better or for worse is another tale, lol!) 

[T2Friends]

When I was feeling the acute pain of the break up I might have answered this question differently.  I remember vividly feeling like I could not breath because of the pain.  Feeling like I would never be able to get past it.  I felt shattered and broken and you see I haven't forgotten that pain.  But I have definitely gotten past it and like others have said, it has made me stronger and I learned a lot about myself for having dealt with the pain and loss.   I have forgiven and although I still carry some of the baggage from that relationship, I don't let it impact how I look at new men in my life.  Not that there have been many, but I don't hold them responsible for that old hurt.  As Crest said, I was not innocent in what went wrong.  So I put it behind me and learned to love again and it is better now, because I am better for having had the experiences. 

[frenchy]

yeah it seems to be pretty much unanamous .. and i fell the same way too.. i don't think anyone is immune to havin their heart broken once or twice or even three times . when it happened to me i just sorta went numb for awhile .. and the thing was the way she left .. she took everything .. didn't leave me a knife to make a cream cheese sandwich .. took all the furniture . all the dishes .. all the money in the savings and the checkin acount .. left me with all the credit card bills .. and then called me a few months later and said she wanted to come back .. this is after i moved and was startin to do ok again .. and when i asked her what was it that you forgot the last time .. just tell me what you want and i'll just give it to you .. lets make it easy on each other here .. she didn't like that .. so she loosened up the lugnuts on my car .. let me tell you if you think you're in love ?? lemme loosen up the lugnuts on your car and send you down the hiway .. when that wheel comes off at about 40 mph see if you're still in love after that.. so you go thru the all the pain and then you move on .. but you don't wanna forget .. cause if you forget you're bound to do the same dumbass shit again .. don't get me wrong .. you try to love again . you just try to do it differently

 

[Karin M Fichtner]

Don't think I'll be doing that again.  Not even if I do it differently.  Too scared.  Too many scars. 

[Wayne Goodwin]

Does leave a lot of scars . I separated back in 1982 , got divorced with Custody of my Girls in 1984 . I want so desperately to get remarried . I just didn't have the guts to really get involved with some of the women i met . My shyness of my body and mind really took a told in getting serious . It has been so long now i haven't the strength or will anymore . Loneliness really takes a told on ya over the years ...