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the family that sleeps together, keeps together? or maybe jerry springer to be....dunno ...but maybe it isn't anyone else's business either...any thoughts on this?


DEAR ABBY: My daughters are attractive young women, both doing well in their professional careers. "Melanie," who is 27, is married to "Sam," an extremely attractive and successful man.

My 30-year-old daughter, "Alicia," has been divorced for a year. Her marriage failed two years ago because she and her husband had an appetite for sex outside their marriage. While I was disturbed about that, I was horrified to learn that Melanie allows her sister to occasionally have sex with Sam.

Melanie's argument is that Sam is less likely to cheat given this situation. When I asked her and Sam about it, he said it wasn't his idea. My current husband says any man who would refuse this "set-up" would be nuts. Alicia claims she "doesn't have time" to date right now, and after she finishes her MBA, she'll seek out a more normal relationship.

I am distraught about this mess. Melanie says she wants to start a family soon. She says she loves Sam, who can "handle everything," and she enjoys seeing "everyone happy." She says Alicia won't sleep around now and, maybe, one day she'll marry a handsome man like Sam who will "return the favor"!

I can't believe these girls are my daughters. Should I continue to protest or let it go? Is this relaxed attitude about sex prevalent in young people today? I cannot understand Melanie's lack of desire to defend her turf. -- HEARTBROKEN MOM IN FLORIDA

DEAR MOM: Your daughters appear to be into the concept of open marriage. Clearly, they do not view marriage and relationships the same way you do.

Melanie is naive to think that encouraging Sam to have a sexual relationship with her sister will discourage him from seeking other partners. Far from it. And as for her wanting to start a family, has she considered what will happen if her husband impregnates Alicia at the same time -- or first?

But back to your question: Are you right to protest? You certainly are. That's what mothers are for -- to inject a dose of sanity when everyone around her is losing theirs.

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so ..uhh . just where in florida are these two sisters ?? 

and the phone number too? oh frenchy  i knew you'd volunteer as a civic duty.....

just doin what i can to make things go smooth .. poor sam ya know .. reminds me of little big man with dustin hoffman when he had the dream about bein under the buffalo robes with all the women and it came true .. but with all his wives sisters who had been widowed .. if you never saw it i think its probably dustin hoffmans best movie .. 

at least he enjoyed nice baths....

I'm starting to think I'm lucky not to have a sister. I had always regretted not having one before.

I can only say Holy Moly. That is one messed up group, except the mom.

well they ARE keeping it in the family...or at least in two of the family members...oh should i have used the word member here?

my own take? whatever they want to do is their business...sounds like they are all grown up and so it is all adults....kinda wonder how close the family is when mom knows all about the kids' sex lives...but hey...i don't know much about families..maybe all families talk about it

I have two sisters and I love both of them dearly and we have shared many things with one another...but this scenanio is lot different then trading shoes or a favorite sweater.

It's interesting they would both have the same taste for one man. My sisters have very different likes and dislikes when it come to men...it ain't just about the sex...I would think there would have to be an attraction and some emotional attachment for an ongoing relationship...different strokes an all...seems quite unusual though.

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