I can't believe April is nearly over already. The trees are all leafing out, and there's such a difference just since last week. I jumped a little when I looked out the Velux towards the woods this morning; it's like seeing someone unexpected at the door.
I don't pick favorites. Always try to get in the fastest line, which ensures that it will suddenly become the slowest and I will have time to read the front pages on all of the fair and balanced periodicals. If I don't want to throw up a little by the time I get through the line, I go to the Exercise room at the RV park. There is a TV there and I can watch FOX news until my quota of half truths and sleeze has been met.
I was riding to work yesterday when I observed a female driver who cut right in front of a pickup truck, causing the driver to drive onto the shoulder to avoid hitting her..
This evidently angered the driver enough that he hung his arm out his window and gave the woman the finger.
'Man, that guy is stupid,' I thought to myself. I ALWAYS smile nicely and wave in a sheepish manner whenever a female does anything to me in traffic, and here's why:
I drive 48 miles each way every day to work.
That's 96 miles each day.
Of these, 16 miles each way is bumper-to-bumper
Most of the bumper-to-bumper is on an 8 lane highway.
There are 7 cars every 40 feet for 32 miles.
That works out to 982 cars every mile, or 31,424 cars.
Even though the rest of the 32 miles is not bumper-to-bumper, I figure I pass at least another 4000 cars. That brings the total number to something like 36,000 cars that I pass every day.
Statistically, females drive half of these. That's 18,000 women drivers!
In any given group of females, 1 in 28 has PMS.
According to Cosmopolitan, 70% describe their love life as dissatisfying or unrewarding.
According to the National Institute of Health, 22% of all females have seriously considered suicide or homicide.
And 34% describe men as their biggest problem.
According to the National Rifle Association, 5% of all females carry weapons and this number is increasing.
That means that EVERY SINGLE DAY, I drive past at least one female that has a lousy love life, thinks men are her biggest problem, has seriously considered suicide or homicide, has PMS, and is armed.
The other day while driving in the Galveston, TX area, At a place where two lanes compress to one to get on to I-45, I observed a Caddilac Escalade cutting in front of another vehicle. It almost hit the other vehicle which had to slam on it's brakes. The other vehicle blew its horn. A young slim woman in the Escalade, who looked to be in her late twenties, came crawling over the front seat, then over the backseat like an attack dog. She hung out the rear window waving the middle finger, mouthing what appeared to be cuss words, motioning for the cut off vehicle to come on up there, bring it on. My thought was "Wow, Somebody has been feeding her too much alpo". but after reading Darroll's posted statistics, I now understand.