Your S/O has cheated on you. How do you handle it?

[jan]

You find out your S/O has cheated on you.....a one time thing, or an affair with someone, the first. What do you do when you find out? What do you do if he confesses this to you? And..can you trust him again?
Men, how about you? How do you handle a cheating S/O?

(Happy Rob, GRINNING!???) ((HUGS))

[jan]

I will be back to answer this...it happened to me, but I would like to see a few opinions on this first.

[Omar Sawwan]

Spurious or cat's or bilker are the worest things in the life , l will be so far and feal away .

[Mother Sanity (JackieRodzinski)]

Nope. I dump him. If he did it once, he'll do it again. (Plus self respect, etc, etc). The relationship is destined to end, why prolong the suffering. Being alone is NOT that bad.

[Cinnamon]

I agree. I had a boyfriend that I was serious about and found out he cheated. I felt he would do it again, and I told him he would come back, we had been going together quite awhile. He did a few months later, and I had the pleasure of telling him I found someone who could do me a hell of a lot better then him.

[jan]

Hey Rob....I used S/O...someone....I thought that was good...I will fix it...I did not mean to make it sound like it was all men...and YES, I know a lot of women cheat. Women that cheat I put in the same box as men who cheat. If you are in a serious relationship, its not right. And furthermore, I don't consider online relationships as really cheating cause he is not sticking it inside her and getting her off. an online relationship is a technicality....if that makes sense.

[jan]

I thought you might be joking but I did not want to take the chance and come back with a smartass remark and really make you upset..

[jan]

Yes, married is married. My husband cheated on me, twice that I know of. I would not wish that on anyone, man or woman. He even told me to go out and find someone...I would not do that because I did not believe in it, and I did not want him feeling easier about it.
Yes, online relationships are different and can bring about the same response from a partner as if you (or whoever) physically cheated. But sometimes we look at someone and fantasize...is that cheating then?
Rob, I think we could go on and on over this...there is no right answer.

[jan]

Do any of us follow the church 100% in what it says...or live our lives exactly like the Bible says?
Me thinks you like debating your side! LOL

[jan]

Hi amazon, I come off sounding like High and mighty on this and I don't mean to...someone gets my goat going and I'm off and running. At another site, someone is giving me some shit....I enjoy arguing, so I'm having fun with Rob.
I am against cheating,and, yes, I have done it a couple times, (tho I normally say I never have) years ago....I've recently cyberred with a couple married men which is probably not right. Some people would feel thats cheating. We all have our opinions, what we believe in.
Having an affair with a man that is not getting it at home...is an individual choice. I've been lied to about a married man's "living" arrangements to just get in my pants..for me, its best not to get involved with a married man.
Would I EVER have sex with a married man again? I don't know, I've met a couple men on tbd that could be tempting.

[Geezer]

I dumped her and my friend who she was cheating with. I was so hurt that I did not date for a year. After confronting the both, he admitted it and she denied it at first only to admit it later. No trust again. I was alone and still am alone and it's better than being with a cheater.

[ZORBO]

Why have a s/o if your going to cheat, there plenty of gals and guys who love to share and they both
go along with it so go out and fine them. A broken heart takes a lone time to heal, some times it never
heals........

[belle054]

Cheating is damaging for sure but I don't think it has to mean the end of a marriage or even a relationship. It could be an opportunity to learn about the relationship at hand....how to fix what's wrong or improve communication. Of course this would take two people who definitely want to find each other again and re-commit. If both parties aren't in 100%, it's not going to work. I believe the trust can be rebuilt but will take some time.