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...The Ranch's answer to you -know - what - with no rules.

Go ahead...tell us what you're having for dinner - we can't wait! Got a cute pic of kitty peeking out of a paper bag? Post it! We live for that stuff!

Math addict? How about a refresher on the Pythagorean Theorem?

Like macaroni and cheese? Tell us why!

So even if you're not a writer or a poet (yet), there's still plenty of fun things to do at the Armadillo!

Oh baby, oh baby!



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Another American icon fades? Dan Rather was giving an interview in which he mentioned the Keystone Cops. After a while my son, 30-something, asked, "What is this Keystone Cops he keeps talking about? He's mentioned it twice already." Now, Son is fairly well-read and even took a course in the media. Have the Keystone kops as a metaphor been swept into the dustbin of history? Can the Three Stooges and the Little Tramp be far behind?  * I am shaking my head.*

Q: Wasn't it the keystones who staged the original Clown Car, or were they just regular clown clowns with inflated shoes and rubber noses?

The Keystone what? The Three Who? The Little Tramp…I’ll thank you to keep my ex out of this…

I was only vaguely aware of The Kops and the Tramp, but very in tune with the Stooges.

I recently saw an old Stooges reel and wondered what the attraction was – all that overwhelming violence  and disrespect – totally unacceptable today – or is it? We can rant  against  the head knocking and eye poking  as we head to the movies and Red Box and get our fill of…worse.

But it was an interesting window on our psyche back then, and even more so today. Ancient Rome and the activities of the Coliseum come to mind, today.

I remember when movies were special. They were  events made for theaters and  were far and few between. You had to wait for them. Now they’re made for NetFlix and Amazon Prime and can be downloaded in seconds.

 Who wants to go to a smelly old, sticky seat theater with a lot of coughing, choking, cell phone ringing people you don’t know, when you can experience the same thing at home?

As I head out to work I turn on the TV (the only reason I have one) and unfortunately often get a short burst of:

“Why was he freezing the bodies of all the women he killed?”

“He was eating them.”

…before I make it out the door.

 

Yep, all that stuff will be gone, if not already, to be resurrected over the years by NPR, National Geographic, and others…and only remains special to us today because it was ours. When we’re gone, I doubt that the future would hold much regard for it, except as a small, ancient, curiosity.

I can't decide whether it's better to watch movies at home or go to the cinemas. One hand, cinema is a special occasion, you remove yourself from the doorbell and the phone & the demands of family or pets. Also, laughter is contagious, so at a comedy you get to share a laugh with your fellows.

Other hand, you're hemmed in, can't comfortably cough or sneeze, have to trip over folks to visit the john, or sneak a smoke if you do that (which I don't).

For me, it depends upon the theater. I am a fan of the Ritz theaters in Philly, which tend to show foreign and indie films and therefore attract a "civilized" audience. But the other, mainstream theaters? Fuhgeddaboutit. Noise, talking, lights from cell phones, unruly kids, etc., ad nauseum. Give me my flatscreen TV any day!

Grumpily,

-M

I don't go on weekends any more, usually morning or early aft on a weekday - full of retirees, so fairly civilized. Back in the day, our moms used to drop us off on Sat for kids' matinee, all aft for a quarter! Coming attractions, cartoons galore, cowboys and some silly kids' comedy as main feature. Boy, the popcorn bounced and the screams echoed .Scarcely an adult in attendance.  A wonder parents got away with dropping off10 and 5 year olds unattended. But they did.

(What was that sci-fi serial that was so bad, with the tin robots? That or something like it played).

Westerly, are you talking about Commando Cody?

I remember the Saturday afternoon movies! My 4-year-older brother was forced to accompany me, much to his dismay. Remember the newsreels? Imagine that happening today -- week-old news. Ah, nostalgia.

…and then there was the thee-ay – ter  popcorn.

Did some research on this and discovered that the secret back then was coconut oil – something that was simply not available in the A&P for home use. So we used Crisco or Wesson…and settled.

Well , coconut oil is available now. It’s a little pricey and critics are quick to point out that “it’s very high in saturated fat” to which I respond “and so’s your momma”.

Additionally, I would like to remind you that anything that’ high in salt, fat, and sugar is delicious.

Love them Big Macs. Only kidding …orange mayonnaise is a huge turn off for this cowboy.

But wait, there’s more !

 Popcorn is high in fiber. Which is good for all you old peoples. It’s  also an excellent source of antioxidants. Which is also good.

I’ve tried different methods. Not bad when it’s popped in olive oil or peanut oil.

There’s something about the smell of popcorn, though. Once, at the Hyatt Regency Miami, I bought real popping machine – the kind you still see sometimes in theaters. (Most of ‘em truck it in these days – pre-made in large plastic bags) If we wanted to drum up business for the lobby bar, we just made popcorn and people came running.

But the best popcorn I’ve had since the good ‘ol days comes from Target. Yep – from their little snack bars. Try it. 

(Marilyn: maybe Buck Rogers?)

Well, I am only vaguely aware of Buck Rogers --- and I'll be, gasp, 68 on Saturday! (When did THAT happen?)

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