TBD on Ning

Say, did you guys hear the news? It seems Eric Holder has appointed a federal prosecutor, John Durham, to look into the whole business of torture used against terrorists by the CIA. It’s true. Really it’s just another compromise, one that nobody is really happy with. He-he! That nobody sure is easy to please, isn’t he? Ha-ha! Eeyeah. Well anyway. It seems The Left says the investigation focuses too much on the underlings, just like the Abu Ghraib thing did, you remember that? Yeah. And The Right says that this investigation will destroy morale at the CIA. Nobody knows that’s the whole point. Sure. That nobody is pretty sharp, huh? Ha-ha! EeYeah.
What, you don’t get it? Oh, you mean it isn’t obvious that this whole thing was cooked up by Rummy-- hee-Yeah, you remember him don’t you? Donnie Rumsfeld? – Yeah, it was cooked up by Rummy in an effort to strengthen the hand of the spooks hiding in the basement at the Pentagon. No? You don’t get it? Well, that’s how it looks anywayz. Sure. You remember. Those are the guys who figured out how to get us into Iraq and out Valery Plame at the same time. Yeah-ya. She was too liberal so it seems she had to go. Ha-ha. EeYeah. And really, the Valery Plame thing was just a shot across the bow of the CIA but they didn’t get the message, so now they’re really in trouble. Ha-ha! EeYeah. They just don’t lean far enough to the right I guess. Yeah. That’s what it is. They didn’t read their scripture.

Ha-ha. EeYeah. Well, I mean, it was included with the daily briefings, wasn’t it? Ha-ha. Sure. Of course it was.

So anyway. It seems Tom Parker at Amnesty International gets it. Sure he does. He was quoted in the press today as saying this whole investigation is like:

"going after the drug mule and leaving the drug kingpin alone."


And that’s kind of what I’ve been saying all along. Sort of. Well, not really. No it isn’t. Because what I’ve been saying is that if we examine the issue of torture and ask ourselves “How did we get here?” then we have to begin looking at the conduct of our War on Drugs and the whole industry of Shark Tourism . . . ha-ha! EeYeah.

What, you don’t get it? You mean you never knew that the reality shows on tv like Survivor and Big Brother are just parodies of life on the street? Sure they are. Only out on the street it’s a lot more complicated. Ha-ha. EeYeah, it is. It’s all about something we call Sources and Methods . Nobody knows what they are, but that’s what it is. I keep saying the methods are killing the sources, but nobody seems to get it, so nothing happens. That nobody sure is pretty useless, isn’t he? Ha-ha! He sure is . . .

Anyway. I say if Dick Cheney is really such a patriot then obviously we’ll soon see him stand up and say “Listen. I ordered it. Investigate me, and leave the boyz alone.” Sure. Of course he will. And do you know why? It’s because everybody knows, when you live your life in the back alley, you have to play by the back alley rules. You do. It’s true. Everybody knows that. And we all know that you can’t institutionalize the back alley rules as a matter of policy.

Why? Well that’s simple. As soon as you do that, someone comes along to waterboard someone like Khalid Sheikh Mohammed -- 187 times! -- just to prove Saddam had weapons of mass destruction. Ha-ha. It’s true, isn’t it? Sure . . .

So did you guys see yesterday’s paper? It’s pretty strange really. It seems in Anadarko, Oklahoma there was a fire over the weekend. It started in a bar, and spread to the news paper housed next door. So much for freedom of the press, eh? Wait, it gets worse. Yeah, it does. It seems that, also in Anadarko, Pastor Carol Daniels was slain in her church, and nobody knows why. I think at this point I’ve had just about enough, haven’t you? That nobody really needs to be brought in for questioning.

EeYeah. Really.

The whisper on the street is that somehow the whole mess is my fault. You haven’t heard? Well, it seems the rumor is that since I outed the Mission: New England thing as an under cover op run out of a basement office in the Pentagon -- allegedly, allegedly outed. Ha-ha! EeYeah, the ATF can’t find the file . . . ha-ha! So nobody knows if that’s true or not . . . anywayz . . .

Well . . . it seems somebody had to pay. That’s the rumor anyway. I think it’s all nonsense really. Sure. I mean hey. You don’t really believe I’m the only smart ass running around with a pen, do ya? No, no I’m not.

Say, did you hear that in Vermont police agencies well be getting over a million dollars to fight crime? It’s true. And a part of that money will be used to hire what the paper calls “an intelligence analyst” to assist in crime investigations. It’s true. I think maybe they could just save a little money by asking the news editor what he thinks . . . ha-ha! EeYeah. Under oath! Ha-ha! EeYeah.

Well, obviously it’s gotten pretty bad if we have to have an intel-analyst to solve crime these days. I mean really. I blame Shark Tourism . . . ha-ha! EeYeah. What, you don’t get it? Well, you could ask Bill Murray. After all, he is the Man Who Knew Too Little, isn’t he? Ha-ha! Sure . . .

So have you heard the story about Scott Gibson? It seems he was busted for speeding somewhere in Tennessee, and when he sent the ticket in he sent a note claiming that he was the deputy chief of the CIA and therefore he was above the law. Sure. It’s in Tuesday’s paper. I don’t know why it’s in Tuesday’s paper, but it is.

So now the poor guy not only has a speeding ticket he has to pay, now he’s been charged with criminal impersonation and there may be federal charges too. Poor guy. He really is screwed, isn’t he? Oh yeah, you know he is. It doesn’t matter how long he’s been a part of MKULTRA or it’s subsequent spin offs. Ha-ha. No, it doesn’t does it. My guess is that, you know, he might actually be a deputy director too. Sure. I mean, why not? I mean, he’s probably been down so long that he’s been promoted several times . . . ha-ha! EeYeah. Sure. Only the program is all so secret that nobody knew . . . ha-ha! EeYeah. And we know how that goes, don’t we? Sure.

Nobodies Talking . . .

Ha-ha! Whee!

So you know, I went in town Monday looking for Heckle and Jeckle – hee-hee. EeYeah . . .

Well, not really. But you remember that cartoon Spy vs. Spy from way back when? The pointy nosed guys with the white and black hats, always chasing each other around and blowing chit up? Yeah, those guys . . .

Well. I saw one of them on the street Saturday afternoon. Ha-ha! Eeyeah. Well, sort of. Yeah. And he had like, about six friends with him.

And you thought they traveled alone, di’n’t-cha. Ha-ha!

Well, not anymore. No-no, because of that thing we call Shark Toursim – it’s a growth industry and nobody knows what it is but yeah, we do, we’ve got Shark Tourism and so now all the sharks are nervous . . . ha-ha! Eeyeah. Well, it’s true. They are, they are nervous. Everyone is nervous, aren’t they? Sure they are . . .

I mean, that’s the whole point isn’t it? Once we all get the feeling that we are living in glass houses, no one will dare throw stones . . . Ha-ha! Ee-Yeah . . .

So, you know, I figured they pulled this cartoon caricature out of Disney Land ha-ha-yeah, just to warn me off of the Mission: New England thing, but I figure, hey. They aren’t really Mission: Impossible types now are they? He-hee! Hell no. No they aren’t. They’re right wing nuts who can’t seem to follow their own scripture.

And ya know, that really tends to tick me off. I mean, if you can’t follow it then don’t preach it so loud, you know? I mean, every good Christian already knows: Render unto Caesar that which is Caesar’s . . . don’t they? Of course they do. And that Class IV road belongs to Caesar.

I mean, I get it. No, I do, I get it. These guys think they are Caesar, because really, they don’t have much respect for the will of the people. That’s what it is, and they’ve been under cover wa-ay too long.

So anywayz, I did, I ran into this Circus Clown wearing white pants and a white hat with a dark shirt. He was just walking by with his wife or something, she was in a blue print dress, and this other pair of guys were following them. Yeah. The white hat turned at the end of the street and started back up, and the pair following him kinda began to mill about, but not like they wanted to fade into the woodwork - ha-ha! NO, not at all. It was more like they intended to be seen. So yeah, they were all traveling together, and one of them I recognized from like, twelve years ago. Short, glasses, and really kinda nervous.

And, you know, he is, he’s nervous with good reason. Sure. I mean, hey. I might really be crazy. Hee-hee. Eeyeah. I might. It could be a matter of chance, or the result of the sum of stimulus, nobody is really sure, simply because nobody is talking . . . he-he!

That nobody - he sure gets around, don’t he? Ha-ha! Eeyeah.

Anywayz. I went back in Monday just to see, you know, just to see, How do ya like me now? Ha-ha! That’s true. It is. Really. And for the most part things were kinda quiet. You know, kinda like the calm before the storm. Ha-ha! Eeyeah.

So I sat on a bench for a while, enjoying my coffee, you know, watching the girls go by. Then just as I was about to call it an afternoon this clown passes behind me and says to his friend:

. . . we have ways to get even . . .

So I stood up, mostly because I usually do, but I was getting up anyway, and I just, you know, it just popped out of my head, you know? I do, I do that. “Really? I can’t wait!” Eeyeah. That’s what I said.

So anywayz. I don’t really know if they heard me or not. I mean, hey, they weren’t even talking to me now were they. Ha-ha. Of course not. No-no. So I head up the street, nonchalant, you know, I cross the intersection and this woman whom I’ve never met says:

I wouldn’t tell you but you’ll find out.

So then I thought oboy. I’ve done it now. And you know how I know, right? It’s because of the mouths of two or three witnesses thing. Ha-ha. Eeyeah. That’s what it is. But really, I think they have me confused. Really, they do, don’t you think so? I do, I think so. They have me confused –

With someone who actually gives a fuck.


Crazy! That’s what it is! Just plain Cr4zY!

© D. Winter
August 26, 2009

Views: 18

Tags: american, cares, dissent, humor, who


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Comment by ZenDog on August 27, 2009 at 4:51am
007 movies . . . I actually like Sean Connery, and I have Daniel Craig on DVD ~ Casino Royale and the other one. But ya know, it all seems kinda blaise - after shark tourism . . .
Comment by Darkhairblueeyes on August 26, 2009 at 9:04pm
Have you been watching 007 movies? ...or maybe Pink Panther movie...
...very interesting...as usual. I doubt that you are crazy...but it helps in this day and age to come across as such. Pull a 'Three Stooges ' on them...nyuck, nyuck, nyuck...whoop, whoop..whoop...they went that'a way...exit stage left...
Comment by Kittycat on August 26, 2009 at 9:00pm
ZenDog, Where is that nobody? What a crazy guy he is. He never seems to do anything. Lousy Nobody! :)
Comment by ZenDog on August 26, 2009 at 5:10pm
What? No comments? Oh, I get it.

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