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harassment?

In light of the the Herman Cain foofaraw what would you, man or woman, consider to be so out of line as to make you uncomfortable in the work place??

What's your personal definition?

 

Tags: badboss, inuendo, officepolitics, sex.

Views: 184

Replies to This Discussion

Well, I have a button that says, "I've never harassed anyone I didn't like."  Is that a no go? LOL

 

You're honest if nothing else.
Wearing that button, in some places, would get your butt fired, as they have a "zero tolerance" for even normal human interaction that has any insinuation, or joking, or flirting. That said, I also think that flirting, and what would be considered gentle joking with sexual overtones is actually a social skill, and normal interactions of a friendly, humorous nature such as that, that indicate a friendship, an attraction even, between the two genders should not be interfered with...political correctness or "whatever" not withstanding.  Just my opinion.

I wore a "Kiss me, I am German" button for 3 years to a German Festival and finally got kissed.  I ask her why she kissed me and she pointed to the button.  The Eon ladies with me I guess never noticed it.

I am neither a "prude" nor an out and out "slut" about sex...discussing, joking, flirting or otherwise; in the work place or out of it.  Yet, I was presented one time with something that was (in MY eyes) definitely out of line, sexual harassment that made staying at my job a tad uncomfortable.  To wit:

Working late one night, in the City Assessor's office, I had gone to the restroom and came across a young lady that was doing the same, who worked at the CIty Clerk's office.  She chatted me up a bit, saying how she had seen me in and out of the office, all the while staring at my crotch.  That was uncomfortable enough for me to state that I had to get going and get back to work, when this "lady" asked me, point blank, "Do you know how to use that thing?"

After hours or not...married or unmarried, didn't matter....that knocked me for a loop, and I was avoiding any contact with this girl after that (which was almost impossible to do, as the Office of Assessor and the City Clerk work hand-in-hand on many issues.

That sort of blatant statement, or anything close is harassment.  I certainly would never take that kind of tack with anyone I was interested in, sexually or otherwise.  Why should ANYONE feel that they can interact with a stranger, a coworker, or anyone else in that bold and insulting a manner.  (No, I didn't consider it a compliment...to tell you the truth it scared the hell out of me.)

I define sexual harassment two ways…

The first is, a boss who says, “Put out or you’re fired/demoted/not considered for promotion/not getting a raise.”

The second…repeated comments/jokes—verbally and in writing/cartoon form—that continue AFTER someone has asked that they stop.
I understand that everyone’s sense of humor is different. As an adult I have no problem saying to someone, “Not my cup of tea, take me off of your email list/don’t tell those types of jokes if I’m around.”
This happened to me at my last job…J was a great guy, but a tad raunchy for my tastes. I asked him to stop, he did, no problem.
T, harassed me via the computer. After I asked for the cease and desist she did not stop. She lost her job.

We had another interesting case at work…D was THE raunchiest person, man or women, that I have ever met…men were embarrassed by her jokes. K told a joke in her company and she reported him to HR for sexual harassment. K thought that given her proclivity for telling jokes worse than his, that she was open to that type of humor.
K kept his job, as he should have [IMO], D continued with her behavior and was fired a few months later.

Herman Cain…I don’t know enough to form an opinion…If the “confidentially agreement” is waived I’ll be better informed and decide then…although what I've read so far doesn't sound so good!
More than anything, I think he looks like a complete and total ass for the way he's been responding.

Excellent point that I didn't mention myself, Quinn...about the simple statement of telling someone that is offending you to stop.  As adults, that is the way it should be handled, for the very reasons you already stated, especially about everyone's very personal boundries or comfort levels.

Once someone has been informed you are feeling uncomfortable, and they continue, it is definitely harassment.

It is a case of a few spoiling it for all. Now you say nothing even if you see a person you want to compliment in would seem harmless. The work place is now pretty androgynous.
What about playing the 'sexual haressment' card for revenge or to get some one fired? Anyone seen that?
It hasn't happened to anyone I know, but I could see it happening...oftentimes it's one persons word against another...Particularly if you're famous.

I would like to answer this one, but...

#1 I've never sexually harassed anyone.

#2, And sadly, I've never been sexually harassed. (I feel cheated)

I've been sexually harassed but i wouldn't dare complain.  :=)

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