TBD on Ning
Group for all Texans and those who would to rather be in Texas.
Latest Activity: Dec 23, 2016
Started by CWO3ROBBIE. Last reply by Aggie Nov 23, 2015.
Started by Aggie. Last reply by Aggie Nov 18, 2015.
Started by Aggie. Last reply by Aggie Oct 22, 2015.
The aspiring psychiatrists were attending their first class on emotional extremes. "Just to establish some parameters," said the professor to the student from Arkansas, "What is the opposite of joy?" "Sadness," said the student. And the opposite of depression?" he asked of the young lady from Oklahoma. "Elation," said she. "And you sir," he said to the young man from Texas, "how about the opposite of woe?" The Texan replied, "Sir, I believe that would be giddy-up."
"The war on Christmas, internment camp in Illinois."
Wise Advice from a Farmer's Wife
Whenever you return a borrowed pie pan, make sure it's got a warm pie in it. Invite lots of folks to supper. You can always add more water to the soup. There's no such thing as woman's work on a farm. There's just work. Make home a happy place for the children. Everybody returns to their happy place. Always keep a small light on in the kitchen window at night. If your man gets his truck stuck in the field, don't go in after him. Throw him a
rope and pull him out with the tractor. Keep the kerosene lamp away from the the milk cow's leg. It's a whole lot easier to get breakfast from a chicken than a pig. Always pat the chickens when you take their eggs. It's easy to clean an empty house, but hard to live in one. All children spill milk. Learn to smile and wipe it up. Homemade's always better'n store bought. A tongue's like a knife. The sharper it is the deeper it cuts. A good neighbor always knows when to visit and when to leave. A city dog wants to run out the door, but a country dog stays on the porch 'cause
he's not fenced-in. Always light birthday candles from the middle outward. Nothin' gets the frustrations out better'n splittn' wood. The longer dress hem, the more trusting the husband. Enjoy doing your children's laundry. Some day they'll be gone. You'll never catch a runnin' chicken but if you throw seed around the back door
you'll have a skillet full by supper. Biscuits brown better with a little butter brushed on 'em. Check your shoelaces before runnin' to help somebody. Visit old people who can't get out. Some day you'll be one. The softer you talk, the closer folks'll listen. The colder the outhouse, the warmer the bed.
BEVO XIV Born as Sunrise Studly, Bevo XIV became known as a special animal who engaged with fans at University of Texas games and while on his ranch, where he was leader of the herd. Bevo XIV began his reign in 2004 when he was only two years old, and he retired from his duties as mascot shortly before his death on Friday, Oct. 16, 2015, after fighting Bovine Leukemia Virus.
The new Texas preacher was a dead ringer for Conway Twitty, the country music singer.
One day he decided to visit some of the church members who hadn't been to service lately.
He went to the first lady's house and knocked on the door. When she answered the door, she said, "Conway Twitty!"
"No ma'am," he replied. "I'm your new pastor, and I came to have prayer with you." So she said come right on in.
He visited several more homes, and everyone thought he was Conway Twitty.
Then he came to a young widow woman's house on the end of the street. She was taking a shower at the time, so she just wrapped a towel around her and opened the door.
When she saw her caller, she threw up her hands - which allowed the towel to fall to the floor.
"Oh my God!" she exclaimed. "It's Conway Twitty!"
And the preacher said...........
" Hello, Darlin!! "
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