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NEITHER HIDE NOR HAIR

She asks me why I'm such a hairy guy. I'm hairy noon and night. Hell that's a fright. Actually I'm not a hairy guy..a little chest hair and on my arms I have now that are white. AND those took over 60 years to finally show up on my body . What I see or don't see right now are these tiny white hairs inside my ears and on the outside. It's nothing terrible or gross looking. My wife sometimes says I have them. I can barely,if at all, see them..those little hairy guys.

I can get those hairs outside my ears with no problem. I have this vibrating trimmer but it never seems to work so on the outside of my ear, a razor or even scissors does the job. Sometimes I'll use one of those disposable razors in my ear. I seem to be able to get the hairs even if I can't see them but I can feel them. The other day I stuck the razor in my left ear as I've done many times before. I felt a sharp pinching pain as I shaved in my ear. I know shaving in one's ear sounds crazy and no....I don't use shaving cream in my ears.

Anyway,the other day I had what I can only describe as a hair raising experience. Just a couple of seconds after shaving my ear and hurting there, blood started flowing out of my ear...and this was more than a trickle. I shoved in tissues but in a few moments they were saturated in blood. Now I was not trying to be Vincent Van Gogh . I called for my wife to come over and she kind of plugged up the areas with tissue .She could see where the skin was cut. I had cut my right ear too but that ear wasn't bleeding. Anyway, the flow of blood finally stopped.

My wife thinks I'm crazy to shave in my ears. I guess I have to agree now. Oh. I've used scissors to cut hairs in my ears too. These are small scissors not your garden variety gardening scissors or trimming shears. . . I think it would be prudent to just limit myself to Q-tips now. I've read that is only advisable on the outer edges of the ear...not sticking it all the way inside where the sun doesn't shine. But I am thinking of using a toothbrush in my ear and applying one of those depilatory creams or lotions. I'm just hopeful I don't have another bad hair day when I do.

NEITHER HIDE NOR HAIR

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