I have been a Deputy Sheriff for 35 years, and yes I am still working. In that time I have interacted with all kinds of people. I have found that there are seemingly good people who can suddenly change into hateful, vile people when I become involved in their life. I have seen the most degraded criminals become gentle and compassionate. Over the years I have learned not to juidge anyone. My life now is so much easier since I no longer carry that responsibility.
I'm so sorry things have been bad for you, I go to Northern Ca often, my best friend is a correction officer. We have been raising hell and having fun for 30 + years. I'm 52 she is a few year younger.
Life can be a bitch, going though my own problems.