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Comment by Aggie on September 16, 2019 at 8:59pm

Lost on a rainy night, a nun stumbles across a monastery and requests shelter there. Fortunately, she's just in time for dinner and was treated to the best fish and chips she had ever tasted. After dinner, she went into the kitchen to thank the chefs. She was met by two of the Brothers. The first one says, 'Hello, I am Brother Michael and this is Brother Charles.' 'I'm very pleased to meet you,' replies the nun. 'I just wanted to thank you for a wonderful dinner. The fish and chips were the best I've ever had. Out of curiosity, who cooked what?' Brother Charles replied, 'Well, I'm the fish friar.' She turned to the other Brother and said, 'Then you must be....?' 'Yes, I'm afraid so -- I am the chip monk.'

Comment by Aggie on September 10, 2019 at 9:27pm

There was a fly buzzing around a barn one day when she happened upon a pile of fresh cow manure. Due to the fact that it had been hours since she had had her last meal, she flew down and began to eat. She ate and ate. Finally, she decided she had eaten enough and tried to fly away. She had eaten too much though, and could not get off the ground. As she looked around wondering what to do, she spotted a pitchfork leaning up against the wall. She climbed to the top of the handle and jumped off, thinking that once she got airborne, she would be able to take flight. Unfortunately she was wrong and she dropped like a rock, and smashed when she hit the floor. Dead!
ARE YOU READY FOR THE MORAL OF THE STORY?
Never fly off the handle when you know you're full of shi*t.

Comment by Aggie on September 10, 2019 at 12:02pm

Comment by Aggie on September 4, 2019 at 7:35pm

Comment by Aggie on July 30, 2019 at 1:33pm

I hadn't recorded a greeting yet on my new answering machine, so when my mother came to visit, I asked her to tape one. "This is Marcia's mother," my machine announced. "Marcia is an only child; she never writes, she never calls. So why not give me a buzz? I'd be happy to talk to you. My number is..." Everyone called my mother. She loved the attention.

Comment by Aggie on July 23, 2019 at 7:52pm

A pig walks into a bar, orders 15 beers, and drinks them. The bartender asks, “Would you like to know where the bathroom is?” “No,” says the pig. “I’m the little piggy that goes wee-wee-wee all the way home.”

Comment by Aggie on July 21, 2019 at 9:03pm

Comment by Aggie on July 19, 2019 at 9:16am

Comment by Aggie on July 12, 2019 at 3:14pm

Comment by Aggie on June 14, 2019 at 9:10am

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