I'm never drinking again!
I'm never drinking again!
I'm never drinking again!
I'm never drinking again!
I'm never drinking again!
I'm never drinking again!
I'm never drinking again!
I'm never drinking again!
I'm never drinking again!
I'm never drinking again!
I'm never drinking again!
I'm never drinking again!
I'm never drinking again!
I'm never drinking again!
I'm never drinking again!
I'm never drinking again!
I'm never drinking again!
I'm never drinking again!
I'm never drinking again!
I'm never drinking again!
I'm never drinking again!
I'm never drinking again!
A WOMAN'S (REAL) PRAYER:
Now I lay me
Down to sleep.
I pray the Lord
My shape to keep.
Please no wrinkles
Please no bags
And please lift my butt
Before it sags.
Please no age spots
Please no gray
And as for my belly,
Please take it away.
Please keep me healthy
Please keep me young,
And thank you Dear Lord
For all that you've done.
Five tips for a woman....
1. It is important that a man helps you around
the house and has a job.
2. It is important that a man makes you
laugh.
3. It is important to find a man you can count
on and doesn't lie to you.
4. It is important that a man loves you and
spoils you.
5. It is important that these four men don't
know each other.
Foot Note:
One saggy boob said to the other saggy boob:
"If we don't get some support soon, people will think
we're nuts."
A State Trooper on the NYS Thruway (I90) gave me a ticket
the other day.
Speeding? No.
I was driving in the Granny lane (slow) and the Trooper
pulled up beside me. I hit a pheasent that stepped into the
road from the shoulder. Flew across the lane, hit the
Trooper's windshield and broke it.
The Trooper gave me the ticket for flipping him the bird.
Students in an advanced Biology class were taking their mid-term exam. The last question was, 'Name seven advantages of Mother's Milk,' worth 70 points or none at all. One student, in particular, was hard put to think of seven advantages. He wrote:
1.) It is perfect formula for the child.
2.) It provides immunity against several diseases.
3.) It is always the right temperature.
4.) It is inexpensive.
5.) It bonds the child to mother, and vice versa.
6.) It is always available as needed.
And then, the student was stuck. Finally, in desperation, just before the bell indicating the end of the test rang, he wrote...
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