TBD on Ning
MARRIAGE (circa 1950) and DATING (circa 1990) GAAAAAA!!!
RECOMMENDATIONS FOR A SUCCESSFUL MARRIAGE
HAVE DINNER READY: Plan ahead, even the night before, to have a delicious meal--on time. This is a way of letting him know that you have been thinking about him and are concerned about his needs. Most men are hungry when they come home and the prospects of a good meal are a part of the warm welcome needed.
PREPARE YOURSELF: Take 15 minutes to rest so you will be refreshed when he arrives. Touch up your makeup, put a ribbon (!) in your hair, and be fresh-looking. He has just been with a lot of work-weary people. Be a little gay and a little more interesting. His boring day may need a lift.
CLEAR AWAY THE CLUTTER: Make one last trip through the main part of the house just before your husband arrives, gathering up school books, toys, paper, etc. Then run a dust cloth over the tables Your husband will feel he has reaches a haven of rest and order, and it will give you a lift, too.
PREPARE THE CHILDREN: Take a few minutes to wash the children's hands and faces (if they are small), comb their hair, and, if necessary, change their clothes. They are little treasures and he would like to see them playing the part.
MINIMIZE ALL NOISE: At the time of his arrival, eliminate all noise of washer, dryer, dishwasher or vacuum. Try to encourage the children to be quiet. Be happy to see him. Greet him with a warm smile.
SOME DON'TS: Don't greet him with problems or complaints. Don't complain if he's late for dinner. Count this as minor compared with what he might have gone through that day.
MAKE HIM COMFORTABLE: Have him lean back in a comfortable chair or suggest he lie down in the bedroom. Have a cool or warm drink ready for him. Arrange his pillow and offer to take off his shoes. Speak in a low, soothing, and pleasant voice. Allow hi to relax and unwind.
LISTEN TO HIM: You may have a dozen things to tell him but the moment of his arrival is not the time. Let him talk first.
MAKE THE EVENING HIS: Never complain if he doesn't take you out to dinner or to other places of entertainment. Instead, try to understand his world of strain and pressure, his need to be home and relax.
THE GOAL: Try to make your home a place of peach and order where your husband can renew himself in body and spirit.
FROM: GOOD HOUSEKEEPING MAGAZINE, OCTOBER 1950
And now...progress:
PRETEND he's Henry Kissinger and your Barbara Walters--then interview him.
DON'T be afraid to show a little leg or cleavage. He won't think you're a bimbo--just very sexy.
NEVER complain (the chops are overcooked, the movie was awful....)
ORDER dessert--a lusty appetite is sexy.
NO personal problems--the fact that your cat is sick and you don't have enough money to pay the rent can wait.
ENCOURAGE him to talk about his work. (So what if you don't know stocks from bonds--could a little high-finance input hurt?)
BE touchy-feely--that is, touch his hand lightly after he says something particularly funny, brush up against him when entering a restaurant, let your knee lightly touch his in the cab.
DON'T brag about your ancestors.
DON'T stop him if he's telling a joke you've heard--laugh anyway.
IF he wants to talk about his shrink, let him. (Yours, of course, is strictly off limits.)
KEEP ladies' room visits to under five minutes.
AT the table, be a little geisha-like--butter his roll, put the sugar alongside his coffee.
SAY "That's absolutely fascinating!" at least once before the evening's over.
FROM "HOW TO BE A GREAT DATE" in the December 1990 issue of COSMOPOLITAN
HAVE DINNER READY: Plan ahead, even the night before, to have a delicious meal--on time. This is a way of letting him know that you have been thinking about him and are concerned about his needs. Most men are hungry when they come home and the prospects of a good meal are a part of the warm welcome needed.
PREPARE YOURSELF: Take 15 minutes to rest so you will be refreshed when he arrives. Touch up your makeup, put a ribbon (!) in your hair, and be fresh-looking. He has just been with a lot of work-weary people. Be a little gay and a little more interesting. His boring day may need a lift.
CLEAR AWAY THE CLUTTER: Make one last trip through the main part of the house just before your husband arrives, gathering up school books, toys, paper, etc. Then run a dust cloth over the tables Your husband will feel he has reaches a haven of rest and order, and it will give you a lift, too.
PREPARE THE CHILDREN: Take a few minutes to wash the children's hands and faces (if they are small), comb their hair, and, if necessary, change their clothes. They are little treasures and he would like to see them playing the part.
MINIMIZE ALL NOISE: At the time of his arrival, eliminate all noise of washer, dryer, dishwasher or vacuum. Try to encourage the children to be quiet. Be happy to see him. Greet him with a warm smile.
SOME DON'TS: Don't greet him with problems or complaints. Don't complain if he's late for dinner. Count this as minor compared with what he might have gone through that day.
MAKE HIM COMFORTABLE: Have him lean back in a comfortable chair or suggest he lie down in the bedroom. Have a cool or warm drink ready for him. Arrange his pillow and offer to take off his shoes. Speak in a low, soothing, and pleasant voice. Allow hi to relax and unwind.
LISTEN TO HIM: You may have a dozen things to tell him but the moment of his arrival is not the time. Let him talk first.
MAKE THE EVENING HIS: Never complain if he doesn't take you out to dinner or to other places of entertainment. Instead, try to understand his world of strain and pressure, his need to be home and relax.
THE GOAL: Try to make your home a place of peach and order where your husband can renew himself in body and spirit.
FROM: GOOD HOUSEKEEPING MAGAZINE, OCTOBER 1950
And now...progress:
PRETEND he's Henry Kissinger and your Barbara Walters--then interview him.
DON'T be afraid to show a little leg or cleavage. He won't think you're a bimbo--just very sexy.
NEVER complain (the chops are overcooked, the movie was awful....)
ORDER dessert--a lusty appetite is sexy.
NO personal problems--the fact that your cat is sick and you don't have enough money to pay the rent can wait.
ENCOURAGE him to talk about his work. (So what if you don't know stocks from bonds--could a little high-finance input hurt?)
BE touchy-feely--that is, touch his hand lightly after he says something particularly funny, brush up against him when entering a restaurant, let your knee lightly touch his in the cab.
DON'T brag about your ancestors.
DON'T stop him if he's telling a joke you've heard--laugh anyway.
IF he wants to talk about his shrink, let him. (Yours, of course, is strictly off limits.)
KEEP ladies' room visits to under five minutes.
AT the table, be a little geisha-like--butter his roll, put the sugar alongside his coffee.
SAY "That's absolutely fascinating!" at least once before the evening's over.
FROM "HOW TO BE A GREAT DATE" in the December 1990 issue of COSMOPOLITAN
Tags: dating, marriage, sexist, stranger-than-fiction, this-has-to-have-been-a-joke-right?, unbelievable
Views: 9
Replies to This Discussion
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Permalink Reply by Dazzling Zoomer Gal Diana on
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Welcome. Nancy.
So happy (!) that you have joined us. Thank you!
"This weekend I'm going on another date , he's 15 years younger than me , a handsome man , but what the heck, I feel younger than I did and have more energy than I did 15 years ago. Those 4 mile walks on the beach several times a week keep me rejuvenated and full of life. Just seeing the Sunrise over the Ocean and the power of the water washing up on the shore brings me new energy and hope."
Let me share with you - a bit about my story and my gentleman who is 13 years younger than I. It will come upon 4 years soon, give and take a time of difficult circumstances that others would find quite astonishing, and if the full story were be told, quite daunting. Especially for Douglas ( a.k.a. here on teebeetee. . . "TSD" - "Thee Slayer Dug"). A most extraordinary gentleman.
Once a woman is past forty and a man is past forty - who are any of us to judge and call to task the subsequent division of years?
He and I divide the time we have knowing full well that at any instant - it can all disappear.
The clock is ticking. There is no excuse for what other people "THINK". Never mind them.
Just DANCE!!! SING!!! PLAY!!! As hard and as fast and as full of everything you have got as you both can. Just dance!
That's all I've got on any given day to share with you. If he makes you happy . . . than take one day at a time, trust your instincts, and be happy! As long as you love you . . . nothing else matters! And if some one else decides he loves you, well . . . if he loves himself too - right in line with you? Cooooooooooooooool! -
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Permalink Reply by Suuse on
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Welcome, Nancy!
I'm with Diana--you're over 40, he's over 40: enjoy one another. Find your happiness where you can.
So what if you never meet "the one"--to quote you: "...live life to the fullest, enjoy each day as it comes...and don't ever take anything for granted. We only have one life to live so make it the best one you can." With or without a man, LIVE EVERY DAY OF YOUR LIFE. Postpone nothing! Travel! Experience! Go! Do! Enjoy!
You never ever ever know where and when you're going to meet someone. After all--I met my husband at TBD1. At first and even second glance, we had nothing in common.
Just goes to show ya....
ENJOY!!! -
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I want to have your courage and your determination and your attitude if I make it into my seventies.
You are our inspiration Nancy!!!
And - don't forget to let us know how things went - if you care to share! /;-D -
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BRAVA ! So pleased you checked in with us Nancy - you must have heard us all wondering - I was going to nudge you soon to update us!
Thrilled to hear about the 10 foot waves! I am assuming you were in a sail boat I hope :-D ??? That is VERY frightening - I'm a sailor. I know. Well done.
I've skydived (I took off a week to lean how properly.) By all means give it a go - ensure you are outfitted and properly trained. A two day "kiddie" course is not wise. This is a very serious sport so check the credentials of the training program. It's not my favourite thing to do - but I did it, and can do it again if need be ( I used to travel in places where I needed to be able to skydive to save my life).
It's harder to jump out of that plane than one can imagine. And my beef is that it's over too soon, which of course is why people become addicted to it !
You are our inspiration Nancy - please keep us posted! -
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Roger that Nancy! Now I'm REALLY impressed! IN the water dealing with ten foot waves? That would unnerve me. What did you learn that kept you both alive? Please share.
Did you know that the word "gal" in Hebrew means wave? ;-D -
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Speaking of Cosmo (way back at the beginning ;) - look what I found today!
sex-married-man
An interesting read. WoW. Who knew that Helen Gurley Brown "inspired a generation of home -wreckers and brought down John Edwards"! Now - that's power LoL!
Any thoughts on HGB - and this article? Is it really HGB's fault that John Edwards is a bounder and a cad? -
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I think the article is a fair look at HGB and her philosophy. But! There is no way on this lovely green planet that anyone is going to persuade me that Edwards' wife or his mistress was at fault: what John Edwards did, JOHN EDWARDS did. Temptation is everywhere all the time--that Edwards apparently has the morals of a Bonobo is reflects on no one but him. It wasn't John Edwards' "bits" that got him in trouble--it was his ego.
We've spent years learning not to blame the victim, yes? John Edwards isn't the victim here--he's the perpetrator. -
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I agree. Maybe I need to read the article again - and take my usual notes, but isn't the author making quite the stretch here with this HGB thing? Last time I checked, men today are not cookies one can easily grab from the cookie jar. They are awake and aware - they know the consequences of getting caught out in a world where there is no where to run to - and very few places left to hide.
Edwards is indeed the perpetrator (as was Clinton and so many other philandering men) and that's how we have to collectively change the paradigm of perception - esp. amongst ourselves!
The stigma of "it's the woman's fault - the jezebel" and "the poor guy didn't stand a chance" baloney - is so - old. -
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