TBD on Ning

Do you think your friends, both online and ones in your everyday life, know the "real" you?  Do they see you as you see you?  I think this could be fun.  Let's see where this goes.

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Although I strive to be a good person and always try to be  kind even in the face of a total idiot and I try not to ever burn my bridges, sometimes INSIDE MYSELF I'm sometimes thinking some NOT so kind, maybe even pretty MEAN thoughts but my friends think I am a saint...LOL!!  I think it is because I am a caregiver for old people and I AM good with them. They like me but People my own age and younger generally REALLY piss me off though!!

I am what I am as Popeye used to say. Never tried to be anyone else. I have one very dear friend whom I met on line who knows me like a book. We support each other. Now Timbo is another matter. He thinks he can outfish me and race vehicles faster. No way Jose!!! ....er Timbo!!!

Phil, one good friend our life is, I believe, the most important relationship in our life.  Most of us have numerous acquaintences that we call friends.  I've been blessed in this life with two best friends.  One passed away and for a long time I wasn't open to ever letting anyone else that close, but the man that I'm best friends with now, managed to get me to let my guard down.  We both laugh about it now. 

Phil, I am delighted beyond any words could describe that my friend was able to break down the barriers.  I've been fortunate that neither of my closest friends has ever done anything to hurt me.  If the one that died was still here, we'd still be friends.  I sometimes think she looks down and smiles when she realizes that I have someone I'm close to again. 

Most of my friends know that I am there if they need me.  They know if they need to laugh, I'll take care of that too.  I think the only person who really doesn't like me is my ex husband, but that's mutual, so who cares about that.  :) 

Few people know the "real me". I am friends with a lot of people I work with. I was always the class clown, trying to make everyone feel better and most of the time I it works. I laugh and have a really good sense of humor and don't mind a blonde joke.  (I get a lot of those!!) But in the "best friend" catagory I only have 3 that really know the real me. In that I mean I could tell them just about anything and they can read thru the me being silly. I am truly blessed to have them.

I am lucky enough to have 4 very good friends.  One has moved to Tennessee, so the chances of seeing her again are pretty slim.  But I keep in touch, and I have no doubt that I would just have to ask, and she would do what she could to help me.  I know I am in her prayers, and she is in mine.  If we were to get together....even after these last 4 years......it would be like no time had passed.  My friend in Florida has been my best friend since Senior year of high school!  We will celebrate 51 years of friendship this coming September.  I literally trust her with my life.  She keeps my secrets and I keep hers.  We know each other almost as well as we know ourselves.  She is the most honest person I have ever met. People who don't know us think we argue a lot.  We don't.  Arguing implies animosity; we have no animosity.  We do, however, occasionally disagree about something, and we'll have a vigorous debate about something.  We will even ......sometimes......manage to change the other one's mind.  That isn't necessary, however; we don't have to agree to be best friends.  She loves me and I love her.  Together we have gone through 5 husbands and raised 7 children.  We have laughed, cried, prayed, held each other's hand, and celebrated.  She was there when my mom died, and attended both my parents' funerals.  She has the extreme good luck to be reunited with her first husband, and they are best friends now, so I am "demoted" to second place.  I am ok with that, though.  In fact, I'm happy for her.  They are not a couple; he lives in his place, and she in hers.  They are not intimate, although I'm sure a peck on the cheek is not unheard of.  But they are inseparable.  Good for them! 

I lost one of my best friends in 2005.  She was only 48 years old.  Her youngest was just about to start Kindergarten.  I still get a tear in my eye when I remember her.  I stay in touch with her kids...one of which I am godmother to. 

One friend has a tendency to be loose with personal information, so that has made me put up my guard.  She also told me (after I'd been divorced from my childrens' father for a few years) that she had slept with my husband.  That has been an issue with me.  I love her, I have forgiven her, and we have gone on to help each other through many other crises over the years.  (it's complicated) But I have to say......that, plus her tendency to tell others about what's going on in my life......has put a damper on things.  I would still be there for her, no matter what, but it still hurts that she would sleep with the man I was trying so desperately to hang on to.  Two of her exes have wanted to sleep with me, but I always said no because of my friend's feelings.  I am still friendly with her last ex, but I make sure she knows everything we do together.  (nothing intimate)  So it hurts that she could give in to my husband's fatal charm while I was still very married to him.  It's just not something I would do. 

Yes, I don't make real friends easily.....but when I do.....they seem to last.  The newest friend I have is a lady whose son flew with mine over Iraq.  We were "set up" by our sons when they deployed, because they knew we didn't know anyone in North Carolina.  We met in March of 2003....so we just celebrated our 10th year. 

Regarding my other friend.....she was going through her own "issues" back then, and was pretty drunk when she succumbed to my husband.  Not an excuse.....but it's a bit easier to understand.  I try to empathize with someone to see things from their perspective.  I'm not perfect either. 

The years of friendship she has given me far outweighs the stupidity of one night.  You'd have to know my ex; he was quite the ladies' man.  He could charm the chrome off a trailer hitch!

Karin, I had a "friend" like that.  I considered her my "best friend"  I happened to find out and didn't let the door hit me in the a%% when I left.  We are no longer friends.  I have to admire you  beause I am not that forgiving.

It was water under the bridge by then. And she was, by no means, the only indiscretion of his. It was just another brick on the pile. But even though I have forgiven.....that doesn't mean I've forgotten.

I don't think anyone can see me as I see me.  People see who you want them to see.  It really depends on the person and the relationship you have with them.  It's all different.  I've yet to find someone I trust enough to let them see the real me, demons and all....

I have very few "real friends" Most of my friends I have had for a long time, 40 years an more. Have one new friend, we have been friends for over 2 years, we spent a lot of time together. I am always cautious about starting a new friend, been hurt too many times by people who I thought were friends. How do my friends see me? I am always the go to person when someone needs something. I am the  "tour guide" We seldom do anything unless I plan it, but have a good time when we do something. Have some fair weather "friends" who I only hear from when they need something- not when I do.




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