Mindfulness

[PartTimeBrewer]

              I am starting a new thread here mainly for purposes of my own catharsis. It is my intention, at least at this point, to make regular contributions. Of course, if anyone else has anything to add, they are more than welcome. If you have any input, please contribute.

              Over a year ago I decided to deal head-on with my self-diagnosed adult attention disorder, (ADD). The inability to stay focused was becoming too stressful. I found myself sitting around watching the clock tick, yet I couldn’t keep “on task” with any project I started. Nothing was getting done and just starting something was becoming depressing.

              The smart thing to do was probably to get professional help, so instead I decided to try to heal myself, at least as a first try. Cognitive therapy and pharmaceuticals (UGH) might be the approved way to go but I decided to try meditation first.

              18 months and countless self-help books later, I still can’t bring myself to a regular, formal meditation program. But, along the way, I discovered informal mindfulness. Yes, I know it is the “Fad” right now. It is hard to navigate modern social trends without “tripping over” somebody extolling the benefits of mindfulness.

              Let me add my voice to the chorus.

[PartTimeBrewer]

A common Buddhist meme goes like this: Pain is inevitable, suffering is optional. The pain can be emotional as well as physical. I'm not sure if there is a formal distinction between the words 'feelings' and 'emotions' but I have just encountered a useful way to look at it. Think of feelings as being like thoughts, temporary states that come and go, while emotions are "feelings with a story attached to them." The quote comes from Timber Hawkeye. (Yes, I am currently working through his excellent book "Buddhist Boot Camp."  The point here is to ask myself, "How many times do I suffer because I amplify some negative feeling that I should just experience as is, and then let it go?" It works with positive feelings as well. Sometimes I suffer when I try to hold onto some feeling whose time has passed.

[PartTimeBrewer]

"Emotions can last for as long as we keep feeding the story."  ~  Timber Hawkeye

[PartTimeBrewer]

I'm going back to Sunday's thoughts about loving-kindness without contingencies, only a little bit more political today. If such feelings arise, but certain people are excluded because you don't approve of their beliefs or life style or whatever else, you haven't found it yet. This has to extend even to enemies. I'm not saying let everyone walk all over you. Resist when you must, but with compassion. Remember even enemies have their own inner demons you may not know about.

But I digress. What I am thinking about is the tendency to exclude others from compassion merely because they are different (any sort of difference, take your pick.), and to try to justify it with some sort of external code of right and wrong. 

No Contingencies

[PartTimeBrewer]

"Bigotry wrapped in a prayer is still bigotry."  ~  Timber Hawkeye

[PartTimeBrewer]

"Do you like to yourself or are you brutally honest?"

That was the question asked in a forum in a different senior site. Most of the responders insisted they practiced unwavering honesty, but I related most to the person who questioned, "How would I know?" We all want to believe we are not only personally authentic but adept in detecting untruths, but without actively attending to our mental and emotional processes as they occur in real time, can we be sure? When we are operating in autopilot mode, are we burying intimate negatives, not only from others but ourselves as well? Can we be authentic with others if we aren't attending to out own fears, anxieties, shames and regrets?

[PartTimeBrewer]

"Step into the fire of self-discovery. This fire will not burn you, it will only burn what you are not."  ~  Mooji

[PartTimeBrewer]

"Love is the only force capable of transforming an enemy into a friend."  ~  Martin Luther King

But remember, even though it's not an absolute guarantee, the world is a better place because you are doing work on yourself, as well as your enemy.

[PartTimeBrewer]

"Be the reason someone believes in the goodness of people."  ~  Karen Salmonsohn

[PartTimeBrewer]

Philosophical today. Life abounds with big questions. Why questions. Existence and Purpose questions. Science has been effective for answering some of the How questions but may not have the tools to deal with all of the Mysteries. While some people have convinced themselves that they know the answers, I don't. I know only that we trust it all to keep on happening, whether we know why or not. We trust because we must, in order to continue.

I am intrigued by Buddhist practices that are useful in this act of continuing, but it is a secular form of Buddhism that skirts around some of the more esoteric, metaphysical beliefs, such as reincarnation. I can feel awe and inspiration same as anyone, but they seem clearly to be naturally arising emotions, emergent features of my brain and body, not anything externally spiritual.

[PartTimeBrewer]

"I believe in God,

Only I spell it Nature.

  ~  Frank Lloyd Wright

[PartTimeBrewer]

If your compassion does not include yourself, it is incomplete.  ~  Jack Kornfield

Sometimes I find myself admonishing myself for trivial things, things I might easily 'give a pass' to another person. It's OK to hold high standards for your own behavior, but counterproductive to bring down your whole perspective of yourself over nothing.

[PartTimeBrewer]

"You, yourself as much as anybody in the entire universe, deserve your love and affection."  ~  The Buddha