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Comment by ozzieowl on February 13, 2012 at 11:15pm

ROFLLMAOOOO Aggie,

I'm still working on the "Murderer" crime,

and also, this is a picture of that Apple's iTit you mentioned...

Comment by Aggie on February 13, 2012 at 9:44pm

Redneck was walking home late at night and sees a woman in the shadows.
“Twenty dollars," she whispers.
Bubba had never been with a hooker before, but decides what the heck, it's only twenty bucks, so they hide in the bushes.
They're in there for only a minute when all of a sudden a light flashes on them. It's a police officer.
“What's going on here people?” asks the officer.
“I'm making love to my wife!” Bubba answers, sounding annoyed.
“Oh, I'm sorry," says the cop. “I didn't know.”
Bubba says, “Well, neither did I, till ya shined that light in her face."

Comment by Aggie on February 13, 2012 at 9:42pm

Apple does it again!

Apple announced today that it has developed a breast implant that can store and play music!

The iTit will cost from $499 to $699, depending on cup and speaker size.

This is considered a major social breakthrough because for generations women have been complaining about men staring at their breasts and not listening to them.

Comment by Aggie on February 13, 2012 at 12:12am

What do you call a blonde in a business suit, sitting on a tree, holding a briefcase?

A branch manager

Comment by Aggie on February 12, 2012 at 8:05pm

It was a small town and the patrolman was making his evening rounds.

As he was checking a used car lot, he came upon Laura and Robin sitting in a used car. He stopped and asked them why they were sitting there in the car.
Were they trying to steal it? "Heavens no, we bought it."

"Then why don't you drive it away." "We can't drive." "Then why did you buy it?"

"We were told that if we bought a car here we'd get screwed ...so we're just waiting.

Comment by metub4 on February 11, 2012 at 7:45pm

one more for ya oz

Comment by metub4 on February 11, 2012 at 7:43pm

no    oz          The recluse lived in a lighthouse.

Comment by ozzieowl on February 11, 2012 at 6:20pm

Comment by ozzieowl on February 11, 2012 at 6:08pm

metub4, I'll have a guess,

`was the Recluse living in an electricity sub-station then ? '

Comment by Aggie on February 11, 2012 at 3:57pm

There once was a religious young woman who went to confession. Upon entering the confessional she said, "Forgive me Father, for I have sinned."

The priest said, "Confess your sins and be forgiven."

The young woman said, "Last night my boyfriend made mad passionate love to me seven times."

The priest thought long and hard and then said, "Squeeze seven lemons into a glass and then drink the juice."

The young woman asked, "Will this cleanse me of my sins?"

The Priest said "No, but it will wipe that smile off of your face."

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