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Comment by ozzieowl on February 24, 2012 at 11:02pm

So soooo funny, thanks Aggie !

Comment by Aggie on February 22, 2012 at 10:29am

You compliment your friend on their mustache and suddenly she won't talk to you.

Comment by Aggie on February 22, 2012 at 10:19am

What does a graduate student with a science degree ask?
"Why does it work?"

What does a grad student with an engineering degree ask?
"How does it work?"

What does a grad student with an accounting degree ask?
"How much will it cost?"

What does a grad student with a liberal arts degree ask?
"Do you want fries with that?"

Comment by metub4 on February 20, 2012 at 6:41pm

Q: Why is a man's pee yellow and his sperm white?
A: So he can tell if he is coming or going.

Q: What do men and sperm have in common?
A:They both have a one-in-a-million chance of becoming a human being.

Q: What is the difference between a toad and a horny toad?
A: One goes, "ribbit," the other goes, "rub it."

Q: What does a woman's asshole do when she is having an orgasm?
A: He is usually home with the kids!

Q: Why don't men have a mid-life crisis?
A: They're stuck in adolescence.

Q: What is the definition of nothing?
A: When a man with an erection walks into a brick wall and injures his nose.

Comment by Aggie on February 20, 2012 at 6:35pm

A frog calls a psychic
Recently, the Psychic Hotline and Psychic Friends Network have launched hotlines for frogs. Here is the story of one frog and his discussing with his psychic.

A frog telephones the Psychic Hotline and is told, "You are going to meet a beautiful young girl who will want to know everything about you."

The frog says, "This is great! Will I meet her at a party, or what?"

"No," says the psychic. "Next semester in her biology class."

Comment by metub4 on February 19, 2012 at 6:33am

Comment by metub4 on February 17, 2012 at 4:26am

How do you know when it is time to "hang up the car keys"?
I WOULD SAY WHEN YOUR DOG HAS THIS LOOK ON HIS FACE!

Comment by Aggie on February 16, 2012 at 10:06pm

When 3 people have sex,its called a THREESOME,
When 2 people have sex,its called a TWOSOME,
So...we finally understand why they call you HANDSOME!!

Comment by Aggie on February 15, 2012 at 5:21pm

I've never understood why women love cats.

Cats are independent, they don't listen, they don't come in when you call, they like to stay out all night, and when they're home they like to be left alone and sleep.

In other words, every quality that women hate in a man, they love in a cat.

Comment by ozzieowl on February 14, 2012 at 4:19pm

Here's another one of those contraptions...

Subject: : THE iPHONE

It all began with an iPhone...
March was when our son celebrated his 17th birthday, and we got him an iPhone. He just loved it. Who wouldn't?

I celebrated my birthday in July, and my wife made me very happy when she bought me an iPad.

Our daughter's birthday was in August so we got her an iPod Touch.

My wife celebrated her birthday in September so I got her an iRon.

It was around then that the fight started...

What my wife failed to recognize is that the iRon can be integrated into the home network with the iWash, iCook and iClean. 

This inevitably activates the iNag reminder service.

I should be out of the hospital next month!! 

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