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Comment by ozzieowl on April 10, 2013 at 2:23am

Yodelling..................

Have you ever wondered where and how yodelling began? Many years ago a man was traveling through the mountains of Switzerland. Nightfall was rapidly approaching and he had nowhere to sleep. He went up to a farmhouse and asked the farmer if he could spend the night. The farmer told him that he could sleep in the barn. As the story goes, the farmer's daughter asked her father, ' Who is that man going into the barn? ' ‘That fellow traveling through ' said the farmer. ‘Needs a place to stay for the night, so I told him he could sleep in the barn. ' The daughter said, ' Perhaps he is hungry. ‘So she prepared him a plate of food for him and then took it out to the barn. About an hour later, the daughter returned. Her clothing dishevelled and straw in her hair. Straight up to bed she went. The farmer's wife was very observant. She then suggested that perhaps the man was thirsty. So she fetched a bottle of wine, took it out to the barn. And she too did not return for an hour. Her clothing was askew, her blouse buttoned incorrectly. She also headed straight to bed. The next morning at sunrise the man in the barn got up and continued on his journey, waving to the farmer as he left. When the daughter awoke and learned that the visitor was gone, she broke into tears. ‘How he could leave without even saying goodbye, ' she cried. 'We made such passionate love last night! ' ‘What? ‘Shouted the father as he angrily ran out of the house looking for the man, who by now was halfway up the mountain. The farmer screamed up at him,  ‘I’m going to get you! You had sex with my daughter! ' The man looked back down from the mountainside, cupped his hand next to his mouth, and yelled out.....   LAIDTHEOLADEETOO

Comment by Aggie on April 9, 2013 at 9:54pm

Rabbits

The first grade teacher. Miss Figpot asked Little Johnnie, "Johnnie if I gave you two rabbits and then two more rabbits and then two more rabbits, how many would you have?"

Johnnie replied, "Seven rabbits, Miss Figpot."

The teacher asked again, "Listen Johnnie, If I gave you two rabbits, plus two more rabbits, plus two more rabbits, how many rabbits would you have altogether?"

Johnnie smiled, "That's easy, Teacher, I would have seven."

"Ok Johnnie," Miss Figpot said. "Let's try it a different way. If I gave you two cans of Pepsi, plus two more cans of Pepsi, plus two more cans of Pepsi. How many cans of Pepsi would you have?"

"Six cans." Johnnie answered.

"OK," said the teacher. "Now think of that with this question. If I gave you two rabbits, then two more rabbits, then two more rabbits how many would you have?"

"Seven, Teacher." Johnnie replied.

Exasperated, Miss Figpot asked, "Why seven?"

Johnnie replied, "Because I already have one rabbit at home!"

Comment by Aggie on April 8, 2013 at 11:10pm

Top Ten Amish Spring Break Activities

10. Drink molasses 'til you heave

9. Wet bonnet contest

8. Stuff as many guys as you can into a buggy

7. Buttermilk keggar

6. Blow past the Dairy Queen on a really bitchin' Clydesdale

5. Get a tattoo: "Born to raise barns"

4. Cruise streets of Belleville shouting insults at people with zippers

3. Sleep 'til 6 AM

2. Drive over to Allensville and kick some Mennonite ass

1. Churn butter naked

Comment by Trish on March 25, 2013 at 10:26pm

Don't put up with their nonsense Phil. Just remember how much we love you in Pennsylvania!   

Comment by Aggie on March 25, 2013 at 9:32pm

Comment by Aggie on March 22, 2013 at 7:33am

Comment by Mark Joel Lane on March 21, 2013 at 6:50pm

Sad news to report on the passing of Vera Genereux's husband. My deepest condolences to her and family

Comment by Aggie on March 13, 2013 at 6:59pm

Comment by Aggie on March 12, 2013 at 11:21pm

A guy stuck his head into a barbershop and asked, "How long before I can get a haircut ?"
The barber looked around the shop full of customers and said, "About 2 hours."
The guy left.

A few days later, the same guy stuck his head in the door and asked, "How long before I can get a haircut?"
The barber looked around at the shop and said, "About 3 hours."
The guy left.

A week later, the same guy stuck his head in the shop and asked, "How long before I can get a haircut?"
The barber looked around the shop and said, "About an hour and a half."
The guy left.

The barber turned to his friend and said, "Hey, Bob, do me a favor, follow him and see where he goes.
He keeps asking how long he has to wait for a haircut, but he never comes back."

A little while later, Bob returned to the shop, laughing hysterically.
The barber asked, "So, where does he go when he leaves?"

Bob looked up, wiped the tears from his eyes and said, "Your house!"

Comment by Aggie on March 8, 2013 at 10:16am

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