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Comment by Aggie on October 1, 2013 at 8:28pm

An out-of-towner accidently drives his car into a deep ditch on the side of a country road. Luckily a farmer happened by with his big old horse named Benny. The man asked for help. The farmer said Benny could pull his car out. So he backed Benny up and hitched Benny to the man's car bumper. Then he yelled, "Pull, Nellie, pull." Benny didn't move. Then he yelled, "Come on, pull Ranger." Still, Benny didn't move. Then he yelled really loud, "Now pull, Fred, pull hard." Benny just stood. Then the farmer nonchalantly said, "Okay, Benny, pull." Benny pulled the car out of the ditch. The man was very appreciative but curious. He asked the farmer why he called his horse by the wrong name three times. The farmer said, "Oh, Benny is blind, and if he thought he was the only one pulling he wouldn't even try."

Comment by Devin Mills on October 1, 2013 at 7:20pm

Funny stuff...if you want to laugh, view this video:

Comment by Aggie on October 1, 2013 at 5:22pm

Comment by Aggie on October 1, 2013 at 5:17pm

A man owned a small farm in South Georgia. The Wage and Hour
Department claimed he was not paying proper wages to his help and sent an agent to interview him.

"You just give me a list of your employees and tell me how much you pay them."

"All right," said the farmer. "I have a hired man. Been with me for three years. I pay him $600 a week, plus room and board. I have a cook. She's been here six months. She gets $500 a week plus room and board."

"Anybody else?" asked the agent as he scribbled on a note pad.

"Yeah," the farmer said. "This guy is none too bright. Works about eighteen hours a day. I pay him ten dollars a week and give him chewing tobacco."

"Aha!" the agent roared. "I want to talk to that man!"

"Speaking," said the farmer.

Comment by Aggie on September 24, 2013 at 4:30pm

Comment by Aggie on September 21, 2013 at 7:34am

Comment by metub4 on September 19, 2013 at 2:37pm

A  doctor in Duluth , Minnesota wanted to get
off work and go hunting, so he approached  his assistant.
 
 "Ole, I am  goin' huntin' tomorrow and don't want to close  the clinic. I want you to
take care of all my  patients."

"Yes, sir!" answers  Ole.

The doctor goes hunting and the following day asks: "So, Ole, How was  your day?"

Ole told him that he took care of three  patients. "The first one had a headache so I  gave him TYLENOL."

"Bravo, mate, and the second one?"

"The second one had stomach burning and I gave him MAALOX, sir," says  Ole.

"Bravo, bravo! You're good at this and what about the third one?"

"Sir,  I was sitting here and suddenly the door opens and a woman enters. Like a flame, she undresses herself, taking off  everything including her panties and lies
down on  the table and shouts: 'HELP ME -  I haven't seen a man in over two  years!!'"

"Tunderin' Lard Yeezus,  Ole,
What did  you do?" asks the doctor.

 
                                     "I put  drops in her eyes!!"

Comment by metub4 on September 19, 2013 at 2:30pm

Dwayne asked Lonnie. "Do you remember that stuff they used to put in our coffee during the war, to make us forget about women?"

 

Lonnie replied "I think you mean salt peter.”

 

Dwayne. "Yep, that's the stuff. I think it's beginning to work!"

Comment by Dee Holland Eidson on September 19, 2013 at 1:37pm

Great jokes everybody. I am still giggling.  Thank you for the smiles.

 

Comment by Aggie on September 18, 2013 at 7:34pm

The man approached the very beautiful woman in the large supermarket and asked, "You know, I've lost my wife here in the supermarket. Can you talk to me for a couple of minutes?"
"Why?"
"Because every time I talk to a beautiful woman, my wife appears out of nowhere."

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