TBD on Ning
Keep Laughing!
Information
The Place to crack up! Laughing is allowed 24/7!
Members: 193
Latest Activity: 7 minutes ago
Discussion Forum
Blondes, Aggies, Pollocks, Morons, Little Patsy, Lena and Ole 396 Replies
Started by EddieDingo. Last reply by Aggie 7 minutes ago.
Sharing The Joy Of All Animals 94 Replies
Started by ozzieowl. Last reply by Aggie Sep 18.
Child Chatter 55 Replies
Started by ozzieowl. Last reply by Aggie Sep 17.
Comment Wall
Comment
-
Comment by Aggie on July 17, 2014 at 6:05pm
-
-
-
-
Comment by AVIATOR on April 27, 2014 at 7:49am
-
-
-
" NO SPEAKAH DE ENGLISH"
A bus stops and 2 Italian men get on.
They sit down and engage in an animated conversation.
The lady sitting next to them ignores them at first,
But her attention is galvanized when she hears one of them say the following:
Emma come first.
Den I come.
Den two asses come together.
I come once-a-more! ...
Two asses, they come together again.
I come again and pee twice.
Then I come one lasta time.'
The lady can't take this anymore,
"You foul- mouthed sex obsessed pig!"
She retorted indignantly.'In this country, we don't speak aloud in public places about our sex lives!"
'Hey, coola down lady,' said the man, 'Whooza talkin' about sex?
I'm a justa tellin' my frienda how to spell “Mississippi”
-
-
-
-
-
-
The 6th grade science teacher, Mrs. Parks, asked her class, "Which human body part increases to ten times it's size when stimulated?
No one answered until little Mary stood up and and said " You should not be asking 6th graders a question like that". I'm going to tell my parents, and they will tell the principal and you'll get fired". With a sneer on her face, she sat back down.
Mrs. Parks ignored her and ask the question again.
Little Mary's mouth fell open and said to those around her, " Boy is she going to get in big trouble"
Mrs. Parks continued to ignore her and ask "Anybody"?
Finely Billy stood up and nervously said " The body part that increases to ten times it's normal size when stimulated is the pupil of the eye".Mrs. Parks then said, "Very good Billy". Then turned to Mary. "As for you, young lady, I have three things to say. One, you have a dirty mind, Two, you did not read your homework, and three, one day you are going to be very, very disappointed".
-
-
An old priest got sick of everyone in his parish confessing adultery. During one Sunday’s sermon he told them,
“If one more person confesses to adultery, I’ll quit!”
Since everyone liked him, they decided to use a code word: “fallen.”
From then on, anyone who had committed adultery said they had “fallen.” This satisfied the old priest and the parishioners, and everything was fine for years, until finally the old priest passed away at the ripe old age of 93.
Shortly after the new young priest settled in, he paid a call on the mayor.
The priest was quite concerned. “You have to do something about the sidewalks in this town, Mayor. You can’t believe how many people come into the confessional talking about having fallen!”
The mayor started to laugh, realizing that no one had explained their
code word to the new priest.But before the mayor could explain, the priest shook his finger at the mayor and
said, “I don’t know why you’re laughing; your wife fell three times last week!”
-
-
A woman from Los Angeles who was a tree hugging, liberal Democrat and an anti-hunter purchased a piece of timberland near Colville, WA . There was a large tree on one of the highest points in the tract. She wanted a good view of the natural splendor of her land so she started to climb the big tree.
As she neared the top she encountered a spotted owl that attacked her. In her haste to escape, the woman slid down the tree to the ground and got many splinters in her crotch.
In considerable pain, she hurried to a local ER to see a doctor. She told him she was an environmentalist, a Democrat, and an anti-hunter and how she came to get all the splinters. The doctor listened to her story with great patience and then told her to go wait in the examining room and he would see if he could help her.
She sat and waited three hours before the doctor re-appeared.The angry woman demanded, "What took you so long?"
He smiled and then told her, "Well, I had to get permits from the Environmental Protection Agency, the Forest Service, and the Bureau of Land Management before I could remove old-growth timber from a 'recreational area' so close to a Waste Treatment Facility.
And I'm sorry, but due to Obama-Care they turned you down.
-
-
A group of 15 year old boys discussed where they should meet for dinner. It was agreed they would meet at the McDonald's next to Captain Jack's Seafood Grille because they only had six dollars among them, they could ride their bikes, and that cute girl in Social Studies lives on the same street and they might see her.
Ten years later, the group of now 25 year old guys discussed where they should meet for dinner. It was agreed they would meet at Captain Jack's Seafood
Grille because the beer was cheap, the bar had free snacks, the house band was good, there was no cover charge and there were lot of cute girls.Ten years later, at 35 years of age, the group discussed where they should meet for dinner. It was decided they would meet at Captain Jack's Seafood Grille because the booze was good, it was near their gym and, if they went late enough, there wouldn't be too many whiny little kids.
Ten years later, at 45, the group discussed where they should meet for dinner. It was agreed they would meet at Captain Jack's Seafood Grille because the martinis were big and the waitresses wore tight pants.
Ten years later, now 55, the group discussed where they should meet for dinner. It was agreed they would meet at Capt. Jack's Seafood Grille because the prices were reasonable, they have a nice wine list and fish is good for your cholesterol.
Ten years later, at 65 years of age, the group discussed where they should meet for dinner. It was agreed they would meet at Captain Jack's Seafood Grille because the lighting was good and they have an early bird special.
Ten years later, at 75 years of age, the group discussed where they should meet for dinner. It was agreed they would meet at Capt. Jack's Seafood Grille because
the food was not too spicy and the restaurant was handicapped accessible.Ten years later, at 85 years of age, the group discussed where they should meet for dinner. It was agreed they would meet at Captain Jack's Seafood Grille because they had never been there before.
© 2025 Created by Aggie.
Powered by
You need to be a member of Keep Laughing! to add comments!