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Keep Laughing!

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The Place to crack up! Laughing is allowed 24/7!

Members: 193
Latest Activity: Mar 14

Started by ozzieowl. Last reply by Aggie Feb 14.

Started by EddieDingo. Last reply by Aggie Jan 29.

Started by EddieDingo. Last reply by Aggie Jan 22.

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Comment by Aggie on September 3, 2020 at 3:37pm: Everyone PLEASE be careful because people are going crazy from being locked down at home!
I was just talking about this with the microwave and the toaster while drinking my coffee, and we all agreed that things are getting bad.
I didn’t mention any of this to the washing machine, because she puts a different spin on EVERYTHING!! Certainly couldn’t share with the fridge, cause he’s been acting cold and distant!
In the end, the iron straightened me out! She said the situation isn’t all that pressing and all the wrinkles will soon get ironed out!
The vacuum, however, was very unsympathetic…told me to just suck it up buttercup! But the fan was VERY optimistic and gave me hope that it will all blow over soon!
The toilet looked a bit flushed but didn’t say anything when I asked its opinion, but the front door said I was becoming unhinged and the doorknob told me to get a grip!! You can just about guess what the curtains told me: they told me to “pull myself together!”
We will survive!!

Comment by Aggie on September 3, 2020 at 11:42am: Sometimes Bigfoot is confused with Sasquatch... Yeti never complains!

Comment by flippr 2.0 on September 1, 2020 at 2:48am: glad i'm right-handed,it's cheaper.

Comment by Aggie on August 26, 2020 at 8:27pm: A friend suggested horse manure on my strawberries. I am not doing that again. I am going back to whipped cream.

Comment by Aggie on August 17, 2020 at 3:32pm: "If there are any idiots in the room, will they please stand up" said the sarcastic teacher. After a long silence, one freshman rose to his feet. "Now then mister, why do you consider yourself an idiot?" inquired the teacher with a sneer. "Well, actually I don't," said the student, "but I hate to see you standing up there all by yourself."

Comment by Aggie on July 29, 2020 at 12:30pm: 12 Commandments for growing older

#1 - Talk to yourself. There are times you need expert advice.
#2 - "In Style" are the clothes that still fit.
#3 - You don't need anger management. You need people to stop pissing you off.
#4 - Your people skills are just fine. It's your tolerance for idiots that needs work.
#5 - The biggest lie you tell yourself is, "I don't need to write that down, I'll remember it."
#6 - "On time" is when you get there.
#7 - Even duct tape can't fix stupid - but it sure does muffle the sound.
#8 - It would be wonderful if we could put ourselves in the dryer for ten minutes, then come out wrinkle-free and three sizes smaller.
#9 - Lately, You've noticed people your age are so much older than you.
#10 - Growing old should have taken longer.
#11 - Aging has slowed you down, but it hasn't shut you up.
#12 - You still haven't learned to act your age, and hope you never will.

And one more:
"One for the road" means peeing before you leave your home.

Comment by Aggie on July 22, 2020 at 8:46am: My IT guy just asked, "How does a computer get drunk?"
It takes screen shots.