Leading a Purposeful Life

[uno,dos,3]

I just attended my 50th H.S. class reunion. Upon reflection I realize that my life is getting shorter and that I should attempt to do some good works prior to departing planet earth. I think I have determined how I can best serve my fellow man (actually women). As I understand it many Muslim terrorists believe that they will gain heaven and receive around 19 virgins to carnally serve them. I can't believe that there is an abundance of virgins around which leads me to believe that if they are correct in this belief .......almost all virgins who go to heaven will have a terrorist anxiously awaiting their arrival. I am thus offering to deflower virgins so that they  may have a chance for a better life in the afterlife. One problem is that in my 68 years on this planet I have yet to have sex with a virgin......but if it wasn't such a difficult task I guess more men would be doing it........so there you have it.

I'm starting to feel real good about myself.....as Dell says....I live to serve.   

[dwalt]

Virgins??? I thought that was a myth.

[uno,dos,3]

dwalt....somehow that doesn't surprise me.

[Lifesighs]

Won't those terrorists be surprised when they find out all those virgins are 70 year old ex nuns.

[uno,dos,3]

Do you mean to say that I'm a modern day Don Quixote?

Well if I am on a fool's errand......then I'm just the fool for the job.....there is no fool like an old fool.

[dwalt]

Well..you could pretend and with you're imagination it might be fun.

[uno,dos,3]

Let's just say that I march to a tune that nobody else can hear.

[Dell]

I shall be happy to forward the names and contact information of any virgins I encounter. As a married man I cannot join you in this worthwhile endeavor but am happy to help save these women from a terrorist.

[dwalt]

You honestly know some???

[uno,dos,3]

That's he spirit Dell.....a virgin in need is a friend indeed.

Chief....I don't know if it's 19, 72, or a kazillion.......I can't even find 1......but if there is one I'm on a quest to find her and save her from becoming the plaything of a terrorist.

Finally my life has meaning.

Dell....I'll be anxiously awaiting word from you.......remember they must be at least 18 years old. I have standards. Actually my standards are kind of low......but I don't want to go to jail again......those incarcerated terrorists are also very horny.....or so I've heard.

  

[dwalt]

I wonder if there are any female terrorists? Hmmm, does the same rule apply to them with the virgin thing? If so I'm out, nothing better than experience.

[uno,dos,3]

The closest I've been to female terrorists were my ex-wives.......had they both not mysteriously disappeared I might have been forced to take drastic measures. To this day I still get marriage flashbacks.....especially at the self serve grocery checkouts  that authoritative female voice, coming from the machine, telling me what to do.....ordering me around......treating me like I'm dumb.....ORDERING ME AROUND....SOMETIMES I would like to.....nevermind.

[dwalt]

Well I won't tell if you won't.  Washington state is a very good place to "lose" people.  Not that I would know of course..