POST OFFICE NASAL DRIP

[Mark Joel Lane]

It always seems that when I'm in a hurry,there's something that comes up to slow me down.   I had a major list of errands to do yesterday on a rare day off from work including making deposits at 2 banks, some grocery shopping,getting a car inspection photo for an  insurance company change, putting gas in my daughter's car, air in all her tires. and picking up my wife at 2:00PM at a local high school where he works where I dropped her off so she wouldn't have a problem parking with a snowfall yesterday.

 

Little did I know, I'd need to have the car washed too before getting this inspection photo as every drop of snow had to be off. But that became a headache later .First thing's first and first I was in one of our local post office before 9:00 AM with a line of about a dozen people already in front of me in the post office lobby waiting for the clerks to open their windows  at 9.

 

I was already disgusted waiting on a line longer than the post office around Christmas. I chose this post office as the supermarket and both banks were across the street and I was trying to get my errands done as soon as possible.  Only one clerk opened her window about 9:05. The second clerk opened her window about 9:15 with the first customer still  at the first window needing a translator as she spoke no English. 

 

I watched the next person drag and carry packages to the 2nd window being mailed to places like Outer Mongolia or the North Pole..It might as well be Neptune with all the labels being affixed,

 

Hooray !!!!  The 3rd person on line was called to the first window with no boxes but had wads of cash for what was for a list of money orders.  Between the two windows,about a half hour now passed as I got closer to the front of the line. Only one person remained in front of me on line as  I frustratingly listened in on both windows.

 

One person was arguing with a clerk saying this post office charges higher rates than others. (yeah,right). When she was finally done,the clerk closed the window and disappeared in the back room.

 

Now one elderly man was at the first window I can hear asking for patriotic stamps from the clerk.  Not happy with them  he asked for stamps with birds or flowers or historic scenes. I mumbled to myself:"Where are we? in a museum? just buy the damn stamps."  As this man continues to ask for stamps like menu items, I hear him clearly ask for stamps with a fish scene. Where are we? In  an aquarium? 

 

The other clerk came back and the exasperated person in front of me finally gets waited on. Finally the "Old Man and the Sea" is finished and I bring   up a package my daughter needed mailed. I'm done in about a minute.It's about 10:15 now. Yeah .I've spent well over an hour in the post office.

 

I left the window with a chorus line of people waiting.  In my post -haste I offered  my postmortem condolences to the people toward the back of the line telling them they should have brought a pillow. By the time.the last person on line gets to a window,those packages I saw being mailed earlier are well on their way to Neptune.