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Why don't they make Valentine's Day cards for

"I think I like you but it's too soon to tell."

 

 How about " I like you and want to get to know more about you before I take the plunge, get divorced, pay alimony, child support and go through hell for the rest of my life, wondering what I may have done wrong or what I could have done to make it better." Love hurts, sometimes..

 

Would you be my virtual Valentine?

 

Tags: cards, hearts, valentines

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I could cross stitch one up for a small fee!!

Yeah, that's just what the greeting card industry wants you to think.

"Gosh, I can't just TELL somebody that I'm all confused about exactly what stage of a relationship it is that we're stumbling around in - I'd better go to the 7-11 and buy a CARD that'll do all my talking for me. And then buy a different card a few weeks later to gauge the effect of the first card, and then another to determine the results of THAT card, and then another card to see if anything has changed, ad absurdum. Yeah, that's the ticket..."

I have Valentine's Day licked. My fiancee points at something she likes in a catalog and I order it. Voila. Done and done.
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Or maybe:

I like the companionship we share.
If there's more here, I'm unaware.
But if you're looking for hugs
Let's work out the bugs
And talk about how much you care.


Forget the societally-pressured candy, flowers and jewelry, for now.
Sincerely
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I have always found Valentines day annoying. Even when you try not to have any kind of expectations, it always creates some kind of tension. Blech. OK, here's another one. How about:

The voices in my head told me to be your Valentine. We wouldn't want to make them angry, would we?
LOL, kainsworth. I think there's a card-writing contract in your future.
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There's just something real romantic about them red-necks from
Oregon.



An Oregon Valentine
(Be still, my foolish heart)

Collards is green,
my dog's name is Blue
and I'm so lucky
to have a sweet thang like you.

Yore hair is like cornsilk
a-flapping in the breeze.
Softer than Blue's
and without all them fleas.

You move like the bass,
which excite me in May.
You ain't got no scales
but I luv you anyway.

Yo're as satisfy'n as green
apples jist a-fry'n in the pan.
Yo're as fragrant as "snuff"
right out of the can.

You have some'a yore teeth,
for which I am proud;
I hold my head high
when we're out in a crowd.

On special occasions,
when you shave under yore arms,
well, I'm in hawg heaven,
and awed by yore charms.

Still them fellers at work,
they all want to know,
what I did to deserve
such a purdy, young thang.

Like a good roll of duct tape
yo're there fer yore man,
to patch up life's troubles
and fix what you can.

Yo're as cute as the mayflies
a-buzzin' round my head.
You ain't mean like those bitin ants
I found in my bed.

You's Cut from the best cloth
like a shirt of plaid flannel,
you spark up my life
more than an and old Chevy pan'l.

When you hold me real tight
like a padded gunrack,
my life is complete;
Ain't nuttin' I lack.

Yore complexion, it's perfection,
like the best vinyl sidin'.
despite all the years,
yore age, it keeps hidin'.

Me 'n' you's like a Moon Pie
with a RC cold drank,
we go together
like a skunk goes with stank.

Some men, they buy chocolate
for Valentine's Day;
They git it at Wal-Mart,
it's romantic that way.

Some men git roses
on that special day
from the cooler at Walgreens.
"That's impressive," I say.

Some men buy fine diamonds
from a flea market booth.
"Diamonds are forever,"
they explain, suave and couth.

But for this lov'in man, honey,
all of this just won't do.
Cause yor'e too special,
you sweet thang you.

I got you a gift,
without taste nor odor,
more useful than diamonds...
IT'S A NEW TROLL'N MOTOR!!

Luv,
from yor romeo

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