AT LAST A GUY HAS TAKEN THE TIME TO WRITE THIS ALL DOWN FINALLY, the guys' side of the story. WE ALWAYS HEAR 'THE RULES' FROM THE FEMALE SIDE NOW HERE ARE THE RULES FROM THE MALE SIDE
THESE ARE OUR RULES!
PLEASE NOTE. THESE ARE ALL NUMBERED #1 ON PURPOSE!
1. MEN ARE NOT MIND READERS.
1. LEARN TO WORK THE TOILET SEAT. YOU'RE A BIG GIRL. IF IT'S UP, PUT IT DOWN. WE NEED
IT UP, YOU NEED IT DOWN. YOU DON'T HEAR US COMPLAINING ABOUT YOU LEAVING IT DOWN.
1. CRYING IS BLACKMAIL.
1. ASK FOR WHAT YOU WANT. LET US BE CLEAR ON THIS ONE:
SUBTLE HINTS DO NOT WORK! STRONG HINTS DO NOT WORK! OBVIOUS HINTS DO NOT WORK! JUST SAY IT!
1. YES AND NO ARE PERFECTLY ACCEPTABLE ANSWERS TO ALMOST EVERY QUESTION.
1.. COME TO US WITH A PROBLEM ONLY IF YOU WANT HELP SOLVING IT. THAT'S WHAT WE DO.
SYMPATHY IS WHAT YOUR GIRLFRIENDS ARE FOR.
1. ANYTHING WE SAID 6 MONTHS AGO IS INADMISSIBLE IN AN ARGUMENT. IN FACT, ALL
COMMENTS BECOME NULL AND VOID AFTER 7 DAYS.
1. IF YOU THINK YOU'RE FAT, YOU PROBABLY ARE. DON'T ASK US.
1. IF SOMETHING WE SAID CAN BE INTERPRETED TWO WAYS AND ONE OF THE WAYS MAKES YOU SAD
OR ANGRY, WE MEANT THE OTHER ONE.
1. YOU CAN EITHER ASK US TO DO SOMETHING OR TELL US HOW YOU WANT IT DONE. NOT BOTH. IF YOU ALREADY KNOW BEST HOW TO DO IT, JUST DO IT YOURSELF.
1. WHENEVER POSSIBLE, PLEASE SAY WHATEVER YOU HAVE TO SAY DURING COMMERCIALS.
1. CHRISTOPHER COLUMBUS DID NOT NEED DIRECTIONS AND NEITHER DO WE...
1. ALL MEN SEE IN ONLY 16 COLORS, LIKE WINDOWS DEFAULT SETTINGS.. PEACH, FOR EXAMPLE, IS A FRUIT, NOT A COLOR. PUMPKIN IS ALSO A FRUIT. WE HAVE NO IDEA
WHAT MAUVE IS.
1. IF WE ASK WHAT IS WRONG AND YOU SAY 'NOTHING,' WE WILL ACT LIKE NOTHING'S WRONG.
WE KNOW YOU ARE LYING, BUT IT IS JUST NOT WORTH THE HASSLE.
1. IF YOU ASK A QUESTION YOU DON'T WANT AN ANSWER TO, EXPECT AN ANSWER YOU DON'T WANT
TO HEAR..
1. WHEN WE HAVE TO GO SOMEWHERE, ABSOLUTELY ANYTHING YOU WEAR IS FINE...REALLY.
1.. DON'T ASK US WHAT WE'RE THINKING ABOUT UNLESS YOU ARE PREPARED TO DISCUSS SUCH
TOPICS AS FOOTBALL OR MOTOR SPORTS.
1. YOU HAVE ENOUGH CLOTHES.
1 .. YOU HAVE TOO MANY SHOES.
1. I AM IN SHAPE. ROUND IS A SHAPE!
1.. THANK YOU FOR READING THIS. YES, I KNOW, I HAVE TO SLEEP ON THE COUCH TONIGHT..
BUT DID YOU KNOW MEN REALLY DON'T MIND THAT? IT'S LIKE CAMPING...
PASS THIS TO AS MANY MEN AS YOU CAN - TO GIVE THEM A LAUGH...
PASS THIS TO AS MANY WOMEN AS YOU CAN - TO GIVE THEM A BIGGER LAUGH, BECAUSE ITS
A farmer named Bubba had a car accident. He was hit by a truck owned by the Eversweet Company.
In court, the Eversweet Company’s hot-shot lawyer was questioning Bubba.
‘Didn’t you say to the police at the scene of the accident, ‘I’m fine?’ asked the lawyer.
Bubba responded: ‘Well, I’ll tell you what happened. I’d just loaded my fav’rit cow, Bessie, into da… ‘
‘I didn’t ask for any details’, the lawyer interrupted. ‘Just answer the question. Did you not say, at the scene of the accident, ‘I’m fine!’?’
Bubba said, ‘Well, I’d just got Bessie into da trailer and I was drivin’ down da road…… ‘
The lawyer interrupted again and said,‘Your Honor, I am trying to establish the fact that, at the scene of the accident, this man told the police on the scene that he was fine. Now several weeks after the accident, he is trying to sue my client. I believe he is a fraud. Please tell him to simply answer the question. ‘
By this time, the Judge was fairly interested in Bubba‘s answer and said to the lawyer:
‘I’d like to hear what he has to say about his favorite cow, Bessie’.
Bubba thanked the Judge and proceeded.
‘Well as I was saying, I had just loaded Bessie, my fav’rit cow, into de trailer and was drivin’ her down de road when this huge Eversweet truck and trailer came tundering tru a stop sign and hit me trailer right in da side. I was trown into one ditch and Bessie was trown into da udder. By Jaysus I was hurt, very bad like, and didn’t want to move. However, I could hear old Bessie moanin’ and groanin’. I knew she was in terrible pain just by her groans.
Shortly after da accident, a policeman on a motorbike turned up. He could hear Bessie moanin’ and groanin’ too, so he went over to her. After he looked at her, and saw her condition, he took out his gun and shot her between the eyes.
Den da policeman came across de road, gun still in hand, looked at me, and said, ‘How are you feelin’?’
Larry was watching TV as Carol was out cutting the grass. Larry finally worked up the energy to go out and ask her, "What's for supper?"
"WHAT?!? You sit in the air conditioning all day while I'm out here working?!? I can't believe you have the nerve to ask me about supper right now! Tell you what -- imagine I'm out of town.
Go inside and figure out dinner for yourself." Larry went back in the house and fixed himself a big steak with potatoes, garlic bread and a tall glass of iced tea.
Carol finally finished the lawn and walked in about the time Larry was finishing up. "You fixed something to eat? So where is mine?" "Huh? I thought you were out of town."
If your in Houston on Saturday. The Houston Art Car Parade, presented by The Orange Show Center for Visionary Art, is the world’s biggest celebration of Art Cars and the largest free public art event in the city of Houston. The parade attracts over 250 cars and other entries from 23 states including Canada and Mexico and an audience of 300,000 spectators eager to see the weird and wild vehicular creations. The parade is celebrating its 25th year and is bigger than ever! http://www.thehoustonartcarparade.com/about-the-art-car-parade/
"HOW DID IT HAPPEN?" the doctor asked the middle-aged farmhand as he set the man's broken leg.
"Well, doc, 25 years ago..."
"Never mind the past. Tell me how you broke your leg this morning."
"Like I was saying... 25 years ago, when I first started working on the farm, that night, right after I'd gone to bed, the farmer's beautiful daughter came into my room. She asked me if there was anything I wanted.
I said, 'No, everything is fine.'
'Are you sure?' she asked.
'I'm sure,' I said.
'Isn't there anything I can do for you?' she wanted to know. 'I reckon not,' I replied."
"Excuse me," said the doctor, "What does this story have to do with your leg?"
"Well, this morning," the farmhand explained, "when it dawned on me what she meant, I fell off the roof!"
A teacher gave her class of second graders a lesson on the magnet and what it does.
The next day in a written test, she included this question: "My full name has six letters. The first one is M. I am strong and attractive. I pick up things. What am I?"
When the test papers were turned in, the teacher was astonished to find that almost 50 percent of the students answered the question with the word "Mother."
"Everybody has a little amount of fear... it's the courage you have to overcome it that makes it so wonderful, that makes a successful bull rider." Lisa Stipp 1998 World Champion bull rider, page 45 of Good Ol' Cowgirl Stories
3. You ever went to a party at a pasture or barn or in the middle of a dirt road.
4. You used to drag "Main."
5. You said a swear word and your parents knew within the hour.
6. You ever went cow-tipping or snipe hunting.
7. It was cool to date someone from the neighboring town.
8. The whole school went to the same party after graduation.
9. You don't give directions by street names but by references (turn by Nelson's house, go two blocks east of Anderson's, and it's four houses left of the track field).
10. Your car stays filthy because of the dirt roads, and you will never own a dark vehicle for this reason.
11. The town next to you is considered "trashy"or "snooty," but is actually just like your town.
12. You refer to anyone with a house newer than 1950 as the "rich people."
13. The people in the city dress funny, and then you pick up on the trend two years later.
14. You bragged to your friends because you got pipes on your truck for your birthday.
15. Anyone you want can be found at either the Dairy Queen or the feed store.
16. You see at least one friend a week driving a tractor through town.
17. Football coaches suggest that you haul hay for the summer to get stronger.
18. Directions are given using "the" stop light as a reference.
19. The city council meets at the coffee shop.
20. You have ever taken a trailer or dog to school on a daily basis.
21. Weekend excitement involves a trip to a Wal-Mart.
22. You decide to walk somewhere for exercise and five people pull over and ask if you need a ride.
23. Your teachers call you by your older siblings' names.
24. Your teachers remember when they taught your parents.
25. The closest McDonald's is 45 miles away.
26. So is the closest mall.
27. It is normal to see an old man riding through town on a riding lawn mower.
Three people were visiting the Grand Canyon: a painter, a preacher, and a cowboy. Looking over the massive canyon, each one verbalized his observation:
"Incredible!" the painter said. "I'd love to paint a picture of this!"
The preacher waved his arms and cried, "Glory! Look what God has done!"
The cowboy exclaimed, "I'd sure hate to lose a cow down there!"
After the Boston bombing the news media has spent days and weeks trying to determine why these men did what they did. They want to know what America did to make these brothers so angry with us. They want to know why these men were not arrested before they did something so terrible. The media is in a tizzy about this new era of home grown radicals, and about why they could live among us and still hate us.
A friend of mine from Texas explained it all to me:
“Here in west Texas I have rattlesnakes on my place, living among us. I have killed a rattlesnake on the front porch. I have killed a rattlesnake on the back porch. I have killed rattlesnakes in the barn, in the shop and on the driveway. In fact, I kill every rattlesnake I encounter.
I kill rattlesnakes because I know a rattlesnake will bite me and inject me with poison. I don’t stop to wonder why a rattlesnake will bite me; I know: It will bite me because it's a rattlesnake and that's what rattlesnakes do. I don’t try to reason with a rattlesnake…I just kill it. I don’t try to get to know the rattlesnake better so I can find a way to live with the rattlesnakes and convince them not to bite me…I just kill them. I don’t quiz a rattlesnake to see it I can find out where the other snakes are, because (a) it won’t tell me, and (b) I already know they live on my place. So, I just kill the rattlesnake and move on to the next one.
I don’t look for ways I might be able to change the rattlesnake to a non-poisonous rat snake...I just kill it. Oh, and on occasion, I accidentally kill a rat snake because I thought it was a rattlesnake at the time. Also, I know, for every rattlesnake I kill, two more are lurking out there in the brush. In my lifetime I will never be able to rid my place of rattlesnakes. Do I fear them? No!
Do I respect what they can do to me? Yes! And because of that respect I give them the fair justice they deserve...I kill them....”
For those of you who aren't in Moosie's Crossing on Facebook, and would like to see some of the old gang, please note that there is a meet-up coming up in the Gatlinburg, TN area. It'll be held August 8-11, 2013.
They have room for more attendees, and Queen Saraka asked me to post this here on TBD.
Although I won't be in attendance, I do know that they have a stellar lineup of, uh, characters lined up. Queen, Still Going, NASCAR Girl, Moosie, Belle 54, CWO Robbie, and the Kremises come to mind off the top of my head. And there are more! A couple of the attendees are former Eons members.
It pays to speak german --An Amish farmer walking through his field notices a man drinking from his pond with his hand. The Amish Farmer shouts: "Trinken Sie nicht das Wasser, die Kuhe und die Schweine haben in ihm geschissen!" Which means: " Don't drink the water, the cows and the pigs have crapped in it!"
The man shouts back: "I'm a Muslim, I don't understand your gibberish. Speak English, Infidel!"
The Amish farmer shouts back in English: "Use two hands, you'll get more!"
There are several cowmen sitting around in the sale barn waiting for the lightweight calves to run through. Suddenly a cell phone on one of the benches rings. One of the cowboys picks it up, and the following conversation ensues: (H - Husband, W - Wife)
H - "Hello?" W - "Honey, it's me. Are you at the salebarn?" H - "Yep." W - "Great! I am at the mall a couple of miles from where you are. I just saw a beautiful mink coat. It's absolutely gorgeous!! Can I buy it?" H - "What's the price?" W - "Only $1,900.00." H - "Well, OK, i guess go ahead and get it, if you like it that much..." W - "Ahhh, and I also stopped by the Mercedes dealership and saw the 2014 models. I saw one I really liked. I spoke with the salesman, and he gave me a really good price...and since we need to exchange the BMW that we bought last year..." H-"What price did he quote you?" W - "Only $110,000..." H - "OK, but for that price I want it with all the options." W - "Great! But before we hang up, something else..." H - "What?" W - "It might look like a lot, but I was reconciling your bank account and...I stopped by the real estate agent this morning and saw the house we had looked at last year. It's on sale!! Remember? The one with a pool, the horse barn, the vineyard, and the fifty acre lake." H - "How much are they asking?" W - "Only $2.5 million - a magnificent price...and I see that we have that much in the bank to cover..." H - "Well, then go ahead and buy it, but just bid $2.3 million. OK?" W - "OK, sweetie...Thanks! I'll see you later!! I love you!!!" H - "Bye...I love u too..."
The cowboy hangs up, closes the phone's flap, and raises his hand while holding the phone and asks to all those present: "Does anyone know who this phone belongs to?"
I am at Aggie First Yell at Texas A&M University in College Station. The Texas A&M show is for First Yell. The band and Lyle Lovett will play with Robert Earl Keen, and Emmylou Harris and Rodney Crowell (Official) on Kyle Field at Texas A&M University Friday night the night before the Alabama game.
Aggie
MAN RULES (These are good)
AT LAST A GUY HAS TAKEN THE TIME TO WRITE THIS ALL DOWN
FINALLY, the guys' side of the story.
WE ALWAYS HEAR 'THE RULES' FROM THE FEMALE SIDE
NOW HERE ARE THE RULES FROM THE MALE SIDE
THESE ARE OUR RULES!
PLEASE NOTE. THESE ARE ALL NUMBERED #1 ON PURPOSE!
1. MEN ARE NOT MIND READERS.
1. LEARN TO WORK THE TOILET SEAT. YOU'RE A BIG GIRL. IF IT'S UP, PUT IT DOWN. WE NEED
IT UP, YOU NEED IT DOWN. YOU DON'T HEAR US COMPLAINING ABOUT YOU LEAVING IT DOWN.
1. CRYING IS BLACKMAIL.
1. ASK FOR WHAT YOU WANT. LET US BE CLEAR ON THIS ONE:
SUBTLE HINTS DO NOT WORK!
STRONG HINTS DO NOT WORK!
OBVIOUS HINTS DO NOT WORK!
JUST SAY IT!
1. YES AND NO ARE PERFECTLY ACCEPTABLE ANSWERS TO ALMOST EVERY QUESTION.
1.. COME TO US WITH A PROBLEM ONLY IF YOU WANT HELP SOLVING IT. THAT'S WHAT WE DO.
SYMPATHY IS WHAT YOUR GIRLFRIENDS ARE FOR.
1. ANYTHING WE SAID 6 MONTHS AGO IS INADMISSIBLE IN AN ARGUMENT. IN FACT, ALL
COMMENTS BECOME NULL AND VOID AFTER 7 DAYS.
1. IF YOU THINK YOU'RE FAT, YOU PROBABLY ARE. DON'T ASK US.
1. IF SOMETHING WE SAID CAN BE INTERPRETED TWO WAYS AND ONE OF THE WAYS MAKES YOU SAD
OR ANGRY, WE MEANT THE OTHER ONE.
1. YOU CAN EITHER ASK US TO DO SOMETHING OR TELL US HOW YOU WANT IT DONE. NOT BOTH.
IF YOU ALREADY KNOW BEST HOW TO DO IT, JUST DO IT YOURSELF.
1. WHENEVER POSSIBLE, PLEASE SAY WHATEVER YOU HAVE TO SAY DURING COMMERCIALS.
1. CHRISTOPHER COLUMBUS DID NOT NEED DIRECTIONS AND NEITHER DO WE...
1. ALL MEN SEE IN ONLY 16 COLORS, LIKE WINDOWS DEFAULT SETTINGS..
PEACH, FOR EXAMPLE, IS A FRUIT, NOT A COLOR. PUMPKIN IS ALSO A FRUIT. WE HAVE NO IDEA
WHAT MAUVE IS.
1. IF WE ASK WHAT IS WRONG AND YOU SAY 'NOTHING,' WE WILL ACT LIKE NOTHING'S WRONG.
WE KNOW YOU ARE LYING, BUT IT IS JUST NOT WORTH THE HASSLE.
1. IF YOU ASK A QUESTION YOU DON'T WANT AN ANSWER TO, EXPECT AN ANSWER YOU DON'T WANT
TO HEAR..
1. WHEN WE HAVE TO GO SOMEWHERE, ABSOLUTELY ANYTHING YOU WEAR IS FINE...REALLY.
1.. DON'T ASK US WHAT WE'RE THINKING ABOUT UNLESS YOU ARE PREPARED TO DISCUSS SUCH
TOPICS AS FOOTBALL OR MOTOR SPORTS.
1. YOU HAVE ENOUGH CLOTHES.
1 .. YOU HAVE TOO MANY SHOES.
1. I AM IN SHAPE. ROUND IS A SHAPE!
1.. THANK YOU FOR READING THIS. YES, I KNOW, I HAVE TO SLEEP ON THE COUCH TONIGHT..
BUT DID YOU KNOW MEN REALLY DON'T MIND THAT? IT'S LIKE CAMPING...
PASS THIS TO AS MANY MEN AS YOU CAN - TO GIVE THEM A LAUGH...
PASS THIS TO AS MANY WOMEN AS YOU CAN - TO GIVE THEM A BIGGER LAUGH, BECAUSE ITS
TRUE!
Mar 4, 2013
Aggie
I’m fine …
Author Unknown
A farmer named Bubba had a car accident. He was hit by a truck owned by the Eversweet Company.
In court, the Eversweet Company’s hot-shot lawyer was questioning Bubba.
‘Didn’t you say to the police at the scene of the accident, ‘I’m fine?’ asked the lawyer.
Bubba responded: ‘Well, I’ll tell you what happened. I’d just loaded my fav’rit cow, Bessie, into da… ‘
‘I didn’t ask for any details’, the lawyer interrupted. ‘Just answer the question. Did you not say, at the scene of the accident, ‘I’m fine!’?’
Bubba said, ‘Well, I’d just got Bessie into da trailer and I was drivin’ down da road…… ‘
The lawyer interrupted again and said,‘Your Honor, I am trying to establish the fact that, at the scene of the accident, this man told the police on the scene that he was fine. Now several weeks after the accident, he is trying to sue my client. I believe he is a fraud. Please tell him to simply answer the question. ‘
By this time, the Judge was fairly interested in Bubba‘s answer and said to the lawyer:
‘I’d like to hear what he has to say about his favorite cow, Bessie’.
Bubba thanked the Judge and proceeded.
‘Well as I was saying, I had just loaded Bessie, my fav’rit cow, into de trailer and was drivin’ her down de road when this huge Eversweet truck and trailer came tundering tru a stop sign and hit me trailer right in da side. I was trown into one ditch and Bessie was trown into da udder. By Jaysus I was hurt, very bad like, and didn’t want to move. However, I could hear old Bessie moanin’ and groanin’. I knew she was in terrible pain just by her groans.
Shortly after da accident, a policeman on a motorbike turned up. He could hear Bessie moanin’ and groanin’ too, so he went over to her. After he looked at her, and saw her condition, he took out his gun and shot her between the eyes.
Den da policeman came across de road, gun still in hand, looked at me, and said, ‘How are you feelin’?’
‘Now wot would you say?’
Bubba won his case
Mar 5, 2013
Aggie
Don't forget to Spring forward.
Mar 7, 2013
Aggie
Happy Pi Day!
Mar 14, 2013
Aggie
Mar 22, 2013
Aggie
13th Annual Tomball German Heritage Festival
Mar 24, 2013
Aggie
Apr 10, 2013
Aggie
They are still baking kolaches in West, Texas
http://www.motherjones.com/politics/2013/04/czech-stop-open-during-...
Apr 18, 2013
Julia A Knaake
how do you help Earth Day and every day
Apr 22, 2013
Aggie
Clever cow unlocks gate.
Click here: http://www.wimp.com/clevercow/
Apr 29, 2013
Aggie
I plan to head the Houston Polish Festival on Sunday. http://houstonpolishfestival.org/
May 2, 2013
Aggie
I had 6 pierogi, 2 Polish beers, 1 Czech beer and a prune kolache at the Houston Polish Festival.
May 5, 2013
Aggie
May 6, 2013
Aggie
May 6, 2013
Aggie
May 8, 2013
Aggie
Larry was watching TV as Carol was out cutting the grass. Larry finally worked up the energy to go out and ask her, "What's for supper?"
"WHAT?!? You sit in the air conditioning all day while I'm out
here working?!? I can't believe you have the nerve to ask me about supper right now! Tell you what -- imagine I'm out of town.
Go inside and figure out dinner for yourself." Larry went back in the house and fixed himself a big steak with potatoes, garlic bread and a tall glass of iced tea.
Carol finally finished the lawn and walked in about the time Larry was finishing up. "You fixed something to eat? So where is mine?"
"Huh? I thought you were out of town."
May is National Beef Month.
May 8, 2013
Aggie
May 8, 2013
Aggie
If your in Houston on Saturday. The Houston Art Car Parade, presented by The Orange Show Center for Visionary Art, is the world’s biggest celebration of Art Cars and the largest free public art event in the city of Houston. The parade attracts over 250 cars and other entries from 23 states including Canada and Mexico and an audience of 300,000 spectators eager to see the weird and wild vehicular creations. The parade is celebrating its 25th year and is bigger than ever! http://www.thehoustonartcarparade.com/about-the-art-car-parade/
May 9, 2013
Aggie
"HOW DID IT HAPPEN?" the doctor asked the middle-aged farmhand as he set the man's broken leg.
"Well, doc, 25 years ago..."
"Never mind the past. Tell me how you broke your leg this morning."
"Like I was saying... 25 years ago, when I first started working on the farm, that night, right after I'd gone to bed, the farmer's beautiful daughter came into my room. She asked me if there was anything I wanted.
I said, 'No, everything is fine.'
'Are you sure?' she asked.
'I'm sure,' I said.
'Isn't there anything I can do for you?' she wanted to know. 'I reckon not,' I replied."
"Excuse me," said the doctor, "What does this story have to do with your leg?"
"Well, this morning," the farmhand explained, "when it dawned on me what she meant, I fell off the roof!"
May 9, 2013
Aggie
A teacher gave her class of second graders a lesson on the magnet and what it does.
The next day in a written test, she included this question:
"My full name has six letters. The first one is M. I am strong and attractive. I pick up things. What am I?"
When the test papers were turned in, the teacher was astonished to find that almost 50 percent of the students answered the question with the word "Mother."
May 10, 2013
Aggie
I went to the Houston Art Car Parade on Saturday and had the best view of of the parade.
May 13, 2013
Aggie
Who would you vote for?
May 13, 2013
Aggie
May 17, 2013
Aggie
I figure I might head to Corpus Christi Bay this weekend! http://youtu.be/ugN0yQ4vIUc
May 21, 2013
Aggie
May 21, 2013
Aggie
May 21, 2013
Aggie
"Everybody has a little amount of fear... it's the courage you have to overcome it that makes it so wonderful, that makes a successful bull rider." Lisa Stipp 1998 World Champion bull rider, page 45 of Good Ol' Cowgirl Stories
May 23, 2013
Aggie
May 23, 2013
Aggie
You Might Be from a Small Town If ...
1. You can name everyone you graduated with.
2. You know what 4-H is.
3. You ever went to a party at a pasture or barn or in the middle of a dirt road.
4. You used to drag "Main."
5. You said a swear word and your parents knew within the hour.
6. You ever went cow-tipping or snipe hunting.
7. It was cool to date someone from the neighboring town.
8. The whole school went to the same party after graduation.
9. You don't give directions by street names but by references (turn by Nelson's house, go two blocks east of Anderson's, and it's four houses left of the track field).
10. Your car stays filthy because of the dirt roads, and you will never own a dark vehicle for this reason.
11. The town next to you is considered "trashy"or "snooty,"
but is actually just like your town.
12. You refer to anyone with a house newer than 1950 as the "rich people."
13. The people in the city dress funny, and then you pick up on the trend two years later.
14. You bragged to your friends because you got pipes on your truck for your birthday.
15. Anyone you want can be found at either the Dairy Queen or the feed store.
16. You see at least one friend a week driving a tractor through town.
17. Football coaches suggest that you haul hay for the summer to get stronger.
18. Directions are given using "the" stop light as a reference.
19. The city council meets at the coffee shop.
20. You have ever taken a trailer or dog to school on a daily basis.
21. Weekend excitement involves a trip to a Wal-Mart.
22. You decide to walk somewhere for exercise and five people pull over and ask if you need a ride.
23. Your teachers call you by your older siblings' names.
24. Your teachers remember when they taught your parents.
25. The closest McDonald's is 45 miles away.
26. So is the closest mall.
27. It is normal to see an old man riding through town on a riding lawn mower.
May 26, 2013
Aggie
May 28, 2013
Aggie
Jun 20, 2013
Aggie
Jun 26, 2013
Aggie
What Do You See?
Three people were visiting the Grand Canyon: a painter, a preacher, and a cowboy. Looking over the massive canyon, each one verbalized his observation:
"Incredible!" the painter said. "I'd love to paint a picture of this!"
The preacher waved his arms and cried, "Glory! Look what God has done!"
The cowboy exclaimed, "I'd sure hate to lose a cow down there!"
Jul 2, 2013
Julia A Knaake
we had a visitor for breakfast
Jul 2, 2013
Aggie
Jul 9, 2013
Julia A Knaake
Jul 9, 2013
Aggie
Happy Birthday, Julia!
Jul 11, 2013
Aggie
Jul 16, 2013
Aggie
Texas logic:
Rattlesnake Logic
After the Boston bombing the news media has spent days and weeks trying to determine why these men did what they did. They want to know what America did to make these brothers so angry with us. They want to know why these men were not arrested before they did something so terrible. The media is in a tizzy about this new era of home grown radicals, and about why they could live among us and still hate us.
A friend of mine from Texas explained it all to me:
“Here in west Texas I have rattlesnakes on my place, living among us. I have killed a rattlesnake on the front porch. I have killed a rattlesnake on the back porch. I have killed rattlesnakes in the barn, in the shop and on the driveway. In fact, I kill every rattlesnake I encounter.
I kill rattlesnakes because I know a rattlesnake will bite me and inject me with poison. I don’t stop to wonder why a rattlesnake will bite me; I know: It will bite me because it's a rattlesnake and that's what rattlesnakes do. I don’t try to reason with a rattlesnake…I just kill it.
I don’t try to get to know the rattlesnake better so I can find a way to live with the rattlesnakes and convince them not to bite me…I just kill them. I don’t quiz a rattlesnake to see it I can find out where the other snakes are, because (a) it won’t tell me, and (b) I already know they live on my place. So, I just kill the rattlesnake and move on to the next one.
I don’t look for ways I might be able to change the rattlesnake to a non-poisonous rat snake...I just kill it. Oh, and on occasion, I accidentally kill a rat snake because I thought it was a rattlesnake at the time. Also, I know, for every rattlesnake I kill, two more are lurking out there in the brush. In my lifetime I will never be able to rid my place of rattlesnakes. Do I fear them? No!
Do I respect what they can do to me? Yes! And because of that respect I give them the fair justice they deserve...I kill them....”
Jul 22, 2013
Aggie
For those of you who aren't in Moosie's Crossing on Facebook, and would like to see some of the old gang, please note that there is a meet-up coming up in the Gatlinburg, TN area. It'll be held August 8-11, 2013.
They have room for more attendees, and Queen Saraka asked me to post this here on TBD.
Although I won't be in attendance, I do know that they have a stellar lineup of, uh, characters lined up. Queen, Still Going, NASCAR Girl, Moosie, Belle 54, CWO Robbie, and the Kremises come to mind off the top of my head. And there are more! A couple of the attendees are former Eons members.
https://www.facebook.com/groups/207544519276764/doc/559709794060233/
Above is a FB link to the shenanigans. If you are not on FB, perhaps I can act as a go-between to put you together with someone who has more details.
Last year, at about the same time in August, several of us rented a beach house in Michigan City, and I gotta say, we had a ball.
So, give it some thought....try it, you might like it!
Reposted from original post by Stir Young in the Forum
or PM me and I can get you more info.
Jul 22, 2013
Aggie
Jul 30, 2013
Aggie
Jul 30, 2013
Aggie
Jul 31, 2013
Aggie
My son and I spoke with Coach R C Slocum about banking and Engineering today at the 59th Annual Beef Cattle Short Course at Texas A&M University.
Aug 5, 2013
Aggie
Aug 12, 2013
Aggie
It pays to speak german --An Amish farmer walking through his field notices a man
drinking from his pond with his hand.
The Amish Farmer shouts:
"Trinken Sie nicht das Wasser, die Kuhe und die Schweine haben in ihm geschissen!"
Which means:
" Don't drink the water, the cows and the pigs have crapped in it!"
The man shouts back: "I'm a Muslim, I don't understand your gibberish. Speak English, Infidel!"
The Amish farmer shouts back in English:
"Use two hands, you'll get more!"
Aug 12, 2013
Aggie
There are several cowmen sitting around in the sale barn waiting for the lightweight calves to run through. Suddenly a cell phone on one of the benches rings. One of the cowboys picks it up, and the following conversation ensues: (H - Husband, W - Wife)
H - "Hello?"
W - "Honey, it's me. Are you at the salebarn?"
H - "Yep."
W - "Great! I am at the mall a couple of miles from where you are. I just saw a beautiful mink coat. It's absolutely gorgeous!! Can I buy it?"
H - "What's the price?"
W - "Only $1,900.00."
H - "Well, OK, i guess go ahead and get it, if you like it that much..."
W - "Ahhh, and I also stopped by the Mercedes dealership and saw the 2014 models. I saw one I really liked. I spoke with the salesman, and he gave me a really good price...and since we need to exchange the BMW that we bought last year..."
H-"What price did he quote you?"
W - "Only $110,000..."
H - "OK, but for that price I want it with all the options."
W - "Great! But before we hang up, something else..."
H - "What?"
W - "It might look like a lot, but I was reconciling your bank account and...I stopped by the real estate agent this morning and saw the house we had looked at last year. It's on sale!! Remember? The one with a pool, the horse barn, the vineyard, and the fifty acre lake."
H - "How much are they asking?"
W - "Only $2.5 million - a magnificent price...and I see that we have that much in the bank to cover..."
H - "Well, then go ahead and buy it, but just bid $2.3 million. OK?"
W - "OK, sweetie...Thanks! I'll see you later!! I love you!!!"
H - "Bye...I love u too..."
The cowboy hangs up, closes the phone's flap, and raises his hand while holding the phone and asks to all those present: "Does anyone know who this phone belongs to?"
Aug 15, 2013
Aggie
Aug 20, 2013
Aggie
I am at Aggie First Yell at Texas A&M University in College Station. The Texas A&M show is for First Yell. The band and Lyle Lovett will play with Robert Earl Keen, and Emmylou Harris and Rodney Crowell (Official) on Kyle Field at Texas A&M University Friday night the night before the Alabama game.
Sep 13, 2013
Aggie
Robert Earl Keen and Lyle Lovett two guys I went to school with.
Sep 14, 2013