Reporter asked to the CEO of a fast growing business firm .
"Sir ! what is the secret behind success of your firm?"
CEO: " Well ! actually all the credit goes to managers of different departments. They are hard working, dedicated ,honest and all of the above ,they are punctual".
Reporter: "But it is almost impossible that all of your employees are punctual .How do you motivate them to be on time?"
CEO: "very simple...there are total 19 managers, all of them come office by their own car. We have a strict policy about parking. It is absolutely free for the first 18 cars but there is a charge of $100 for the 19th one.

This could happen to any of us...
$5.37! That's what the kid behind the counter at Taco Bell said to me. I dug into my pocket and pulled out some lint and two dimes and
something that used to be a Jolly Rancher. Having already handed the kid a five-spot, I started to head back out to the truck to grab some change when the kid with the Elmo hairdo said the hardest thing anyone has ever said to me. He said, "It's OK. I'll just give you the senior citizen discount."
I turned to see who he was talking to and then heard the sound of change hitting the counter in front of me. "Only $4.68" he said cheerfully.
I stood there stupefied. I am 56, not even 60 yet? A mere child! Senior citizen?
I took my burrito and walked out to the truck wondering what was wrong with Elmo. Was he blind? As I sat in the truck, my blood began to boil. Old? Me?
I'll show him, I thought. I opened the door and headed back inside. I strode to the counter, and there he was waiting with a smile.
Before I could say a word, he held up something and jingled it in front of me, like I could be that easily distracted! What am I now? A toddler?
"Dude! Can't get too far without your car keys, eh?" I stared with utter disdain at the keys. I began to rationalize in my mind.!
"Leaving keys behind hardly makes a man elderly! It could happen to anyone!"
I turned and headed back to the truck. I slipped the key into the ignition, but it wouldn't turn. What now? I checked my keys and tried another. Still nothing.
That's when I noticed the purple beads hanging from my rear view mirror. I had no purple beads hanging from my rear view mirror.
Then, a few other objects came into focus. The car seat in the back seat. Happy Meal toys spread all over the floorboard. A partially eaten doughnut on the dashboard.
Faster than you can say ginkgo biloba, I flew out of the alien vehicle.
Moments later I was speeding out of the parking lot, relieved to finally be leaving this nightmarish stop in my life. That is when I felt it, deep in the bowels of my stomach: hunger! My stomach growled and churned, and I reached to grab my burrito, only it was nowhere to be found.
I swung the truck around, gathered my courage, and strode back into the restaurant one final time. There Elmo stood, draped in youth and black nail polish. All I could think was, "What is the world coming to?"
All I could say was, "Did I leave my food and drink in here"? At this point I was ready to ask a Boy Scout to help me back to my vehicle, and then go straight home and apply for Social Security benefits.
Elmo had no clue. I walked back out to the truck, and suddenly a young lad came up and tugged on my jeans to get my attention.. He was holding up a drink and a bag. His mother explained, "I think you left this in my truck by mistake."
I took the food and drink from the little boy and sheepishly apologized.
She offered these kind words: "It's OK. My grandfather does stuff like this all the time."
All of this is to explain how I got a ticket doing 85 in a 40. Yes, I was racing some punk kid in a Toyota Prius. And no, I told the officer, I'm not too old to be driving this fast.
As I walked in the front door, my wife met me halfway down the hall. I handed her a bag of cold food and a $300 speeding ticket. I promptly sat in my rocking chair and covered up my legs with a blankey.
The good news was I had successfully found my way home.
P.S.. Save the earth...... It's the only planet with chocolate!!!!!

I can relate to that.  I got into a wrong car leaving the courthouse one day.  When I sat down and went to put my purse in the passenger seat, I noticed a briefcase sitting there on leather seats.  I didn't have leather seats or a briefcase.  But hey... it was the right color. I exited as hurriedly as I could and hoped no one had noticed. 

No worries about the wrong car...only 1 or 2 30 year old white Subaru Legacies in this town. Oh...take the discount and run. 

Many years ago when I was far from even being 50, I I kept trying to unlock my white Granada in a parking lot.   I couldn't figure out why the key didn't open the door.  I did the same as you Syble.  I finally looked inside and saw green interior - mine was white!  I was stunned and confused at the same time and quickly looked around for MY car.  I also went shopping at a mall and came out looking for my car - that was before they had key fobs and a signal locating your car.  I went up and down the rows and couldn't find it.  I couldn't believe  I couldn't find it and thought it must have been stolen.  Then I remembered, I parked it in the back lot.  Geesh - I wasn't that old then either!

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Good Morning to you, Jozee and to everyone else. Happy New Year! :-)

Julie Andrews Turning 79 - this is hysterical!
To commemorate her birthday , actress/vocalist, Julie Andrews made a special appearance at Manhattan's Radio City Music Hall for the benefit of the AARP. One of the musical numbers she performed was 'My Favorite Things' from the legendary movie 'Sound Of Music'. Here are the lyrics she used:
(Sing It!) - If you sing it, its especially hysterical!!!
Botox and nose drops and needles for knitting,
Walkers and handrails and new dental fittings,
Bundles of magazines tied up in string,
These are a few of my favorite things.
Cadillacs and cataracts, hearing aids and glasses,
Polident and Fixodent and false teeth in glasses,
Pacemakers, golf carts and porches with swings,
These are a few of my favorite things.
When the pipes leak, When the bones creak,
When the knees go bad,
I simply remember my favorite things,
And then I don't feel so bad.
Hot tea and crumpets and corn pads for bunions,
No spicy hot food or food cooked with onions,
Bathrobes and heating pads and hot meals they bring,
These are a few of my favorite things.
Back pain, confused brains and no need for sinnin',
Thin bones and fractures and hair that is thinnin',
And we won't mention our short shrunken frames,
When we remember our favorite things.
When the joints ache, When the hips break,
When the eyes grow dim,
Then I remember the great life I've had,
And then I don't feel so bad.
>>>>>>>>>>>>> > >>>>>>>>>>>> >>>>>>>
(Ms. Andrews received a standing ovation from the crowd
that lasted over four minutes and repeated encores. Please
share Ms. Andrews' clever wit and humor with others who
would appreciate it.)

LOL Aggie, very cute

Good one, Aggie.

Two Tips for Christmas:
1. Forget the past. You can't change it.
2. Forget the present. I didn't get you one.

There have been times when that cat may have been right. 

Chicken Soup

Fitness tip:
Today is a leap day….The carbs you take in today won’t count for another 4 years

Due to inflation, a picture is now only worth 700 words.

Has anyone heard from PartTimeBrewer? I got an email from TBD with a msg from PTB for every member of this group, but the message is not showing up here in the group???? Hope he's ok.

He responded in discussions about hip replacement.

Oh, ok; still can't figure out why his other message is not showing up here, though.

This is the message I got in e-mail from PartTimeBrewer.

A message from PartTimeBrewer to all members of Boomerville Friends on TBD!

I just want to inform the group about my recent absence from activity here. I have been reluctant to say anything, but I have been undergoing treatment (radiation and chemotherapy) for oral cancer. The treatment has ended and I am slowly recovering. It is too early to know for sure, but it seems to be gone. They estimated 80-90 percent odds of a total cure. Right now I have to be weaned off a feeding tube directly into my stomach. It's really weird to have to learn to enjoy eating again. Hopefully, I can resume normal activities soon, including keeping up with social media.

Thanks Syble. I wasn’t aware.

Thanks, Syble; I got the same message in my email but thought it would show up here too; thanks.

I also wondered why it didn't show up here.

If PartTimeBrewer is reading this, know that we are all concerned and hope you have a speedy recovery.  Let us know how you are doing. 

PTB, I hope your recovery continues smoothly and quickly.  Please keep us updated!

Happy 4th of July!🇺🇸🎆

A farmer had some puppies he needed to sell. He painted a sign advertising the four pups and set about nailing it to a post on the edge of his yard. As he was driving the last nail into the post, he felt a tug on his overalls. He looked down into the eyes of a little boy.
"Mister," he said, "I want to buy one of your puppies."
"Well," said the farmer, as he rubbed the sweat off the back of his neck, "These puppies come from fine parents and cost a good deal of money."
The boy dropped his head for a moment. Then reaching deep into his pocket, he pulled out a handful of change and held it up to the farmer.
"I've got thirty-nine cents. Is that enough to take a look?"
"Sure," said the farmer. And with that he let out a whistle. "Here, Dolly!" he called.
Out from the doghouse and down the ramp ran Dolly followed by four little balls of fur. The little boy pressed his face against the chain link fence. His eyes danced with delight. As the dogs made their way to the fence, the little boy noticed something else stirring inside the doghouse.
Slowly another little ball appeared, this one noticeably smaller. Down the ramp it slid.
Then in a somewhat awkward manner, the little pup began hobbling toward the others, doing its best to catch up...
"I want that one," the little boy said, pointing to the runt.
The farmer knelt down at the boy's side and said, "Son, you don't want that puppy. He will never be able to run and play with you like these other dogs would."
With that, the little boy stepped back from the fence, reached down, and began rolling up one leg of his trousers. In doing so he revealed a steel brace running down both sides of his leg attaching itself to a specially made shoe. Looking back up at the farmer, he said, "You see sir, I don't run too well myself, and he will need someone who understands."
With tears in his eyes, the farmer reached down and picked up the little pup. Holding it carefully he handed it to the little boy.
"How much?" asked the little boy.
"No charge," answered the farmer, "There's no charge for love."
Writer: Unknown0

I have had a few friend requests lately but have declined them as I am no longer active on here.  I keep my profile so that this group can continue.  Thanks.