HOW TO FLAMBE A TOWEL

[Mark Joel Lane]

1...Cook some cheap tasteless breaded flounder that was on sale in your grocery's frozen department.
2...Spray the frying pan you are cooking it in with lots of Pam or another brand of cooking spray. I've been using this Mazola spray I bought at a 99 cents store .
3...Add ketchup and garlic and pepper to the fish after you turn it over. Notice how it's black on the bottom and so is the frying pan. Oops .
4...Wipe the splattered spray that you see on the stove with one of your wife's favorite dish towels so she doesn't complain that you leave the stove dirty.
5...Go down into your basement and bring up some cans of sodas as the ones you keep in the refrigerator are running low.
6...You smell something burning, as you walk up the stairs to discover that the dish towel you placed next to the sink is on fire !!! You must have accidentally had some of the towel hit the flame as you were cleaning the top of the stove.
7...You quickly put the burning towel in the sink and run the faucet over it, noticing it is charred and full of holes now.
8...Your wife come's down screaming at you about the awful burning odor she smells upstairs.
9...You explain it was an accident but she responds,"X&%$#*^!I"
10...Your have no appetite and the fish tastes like burnt rubber.

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[Grammie Sue]

Oh my goodness. LOL well if my husband were on here he would tell you about the time I put eggs on to boil and called him from the mall when I remembered I had left them.  He said he had come inside to get a drink of water, he was mowing the lawn, and found the pan on the floor and egg and egg shells plastered all over the kitchen, even on the ceiling.   Sorry about your dinner.  It happens.