Regrets, I've had a few. But then again, too few to mention.
My "bucket list" is pretty short. And some of the things on there (like spending the summer solstice in Reykjavik, Iceland) are closer to pipe dreams than bucket wishes. Mostly I've had a life where I've mostly gotten to do what I wanted to do. With few regrets.
One of the few things I would like to do before my bucket gets kicked is to fall in love again. Head-over-heels, foolishly, gloriously in love. Weak-kneed, breathless, astounded love.
When I was born, a little 10 year old boy looked at me and "promised" he would wait for me to grow up and marry me. He was the son of my grandparent's best friends. Every time I saw him over the years, he was sweet to me and at about 14/15, he would flirt a little when he "came home" once a year but when I was about 16, as he was leaving to "go home" to Phoenix for another year, he kissed me. About a year later, he met who would be his wife and married a year later. Part of my heart cried for the next 25 years. His mom died, I sent a card and he emailed me. I wanted to send him some pictures my grandparents had so I asked him to send an email. (The 4 of them travelled every state in the USA except for Hawaii and ALAska) Well, we had "a few" conversation and got everything out on the table. He said he was "in love with me from the moment he looked into those baby blue eyes and every time he saw me, he felt the same way but didn't want to seem like a PERV and disrespect our families so he never went beyond innocent flirting and tHAT ONE KISS!! The truth is, our families would have LOVED if we had gotten together. His wife has her own life, her own money, her own room, etc. and she doesn't much care that he is there but he committed to her all those years ago to stay married to her. We almost started something but for US, where would it lead? His kids would eventually be able to trace me back to who I am related to. My dad is good friends with his wife and remaining family. I decided the cost was too great. ALTHOUGH, I am sure glad he told me what he did.
Phil...I pray that things work out for you and that you do what is right in your hearts.
Hi Phil, I am glad you got things straightened out.I think we have all done silly things when we fall in love.I know you will find the right woman.Keep your faith and it will happen.
My newest romance fizzled out. I caught him in a few lies and I just can't stand a liar.He seemed so sweet and honest.I heard from my ex fiance. We decided to write each other again. I do miss him. I am asking God to guide me along the way. I am just going to enjoy my family and do what i feel is right for a while.I actually feel relieved. Let me know how you are doing. Have a nice new week!
Hi Phil, Thank you for your encouraging words. I am a Women of God! He will continue to walk with me I am sure. I am a romantic , I will always keep my heart and my eyes open. Thank you for the advice. Have A Blessed Week!
Hi Phil, Glad you are seeing someone again. I am letting my heart and head take a break, Its too hot to worry about at this moment.If I ever get to Reno I would enjoy having a cup of coffee with you.Thanks for asking.Good Luck with your new romance.
Well, LAST WEEKEND, I recently saw again a man I met 2 years ago. And I am now having a "little regret" that I've wasted 2 years!! But I guess if I had it to do over again, it would turn out the same way anyway. My aunt has a summer cottage where "everyone" in the neighborhood KNOWS everyone. Well, TWO summers ago, "Bill"'s dog and my dog became friends "first". One night, My aunt/uncle had a little bonfire with some neighbors but they are early birds and everyone soon dispersed but Bill and I were still talking when my aunt and uncle went in to bed. We talked and talked and talked until we heard the first birds chirp and the first colors of the morning!! We laughed to think we talked THAT long! I was supposed to drive home around 9:00...a 3 hour drive!! LAter on, he called to see if I got home. We talked briefly. At that time, I could NOT be on a cellphone for more than 10 minutes without my USUAL 24 hour headache going Migraine style. I PREFERRED to text but this guy stated he did NOT TEXT, did not know how and was NOT gonna learn.....LOL!! I almost never even pursued someone at that time if they did NOT text!! And THAT is partly what happened, He called 2-3 more times, over the next 2 weeks and left a message. The last one said," I hope I didn't say anything WRONG." I was gonna call him and tell him DEFINITELY NOT but a week later, my phone died and took all my contacts with it! With NO MONEY to take that trip up there and working all weekends to boot, I just never saw him again though I DID think of him often and the great conversation we had.
You have to be careful of my aunt...she is always got her ear to the gossip mill and always on the lookout for "potential" couples.....LOL!! The trouble is she is a total blast and everyone can't help but love her. But tread lightly on what you tell her. I DID NOT tell her we were out there all night (maybe she KNEW?) because I didn't want her imagining what happened which was simply that we talked all night...no MORE, no LESS!!
SOOOO.....I arrive last weekend at night and my aunt's dog barks around 9 and its Bill and his dog and he shouts out hey, how ARE you? The next day we spent the afternoon out on his jetski with his Black lab riding along....LOL!! His friends (2 other couples) were with us most of the time. The next day was more of the same but the friends never showed up on the island so we lost track of the time again and talked until it was my deadline for heading home. I was amazed at all he remembered about last time. Somehow I had "forgotten" that his bday was 10 days (PLUS 3years) before MINE until we got on that island and when I "guessed" his bday, he said and YOURS is the 15th RIGHT?! He forgave me by the way....LOL!
It was funny, he said I could text him, he could READ them but he STILL couldn't text. While we were still UP there at the lake, I texted him. AND he told me later, he did receive them. And I said it was like "Praying to God" because I didn't get an audible response. YESTERDAY, he couldn't resist my one sided text and he texted me and I said, Is this GOD because BILL can't text? LOL! SO he FINALLY taught himself to text. (And NOW it doesn't matter so much as my headaches have diminished!)
Well, so him and I are getting along and my aunt practically has that poor bachelor married by now!! The thing is....I have been "planning" (more like HOPING) to move in that area since I moved to Pittsburgh. (well, NOT really THAT area but SOMEWHERE around Cleveland where Lake Erie is. My hometown was only supposed to be a stepping stone on the journey to my dream.....living near the lake. Every now and then, my aunt asks about it. THIS was one such weekend. I don't want it to seem like I am "following Bill" because I am NOT but I really DO like him! (And if you believe in Astrology which I mostly look at as FUN, and that's about it, we are THE most perfect match because we are both Scorpios, although it can also be a perfect disaster. THATS what it says....LOL!) WITH or WITHOUT him, I WANT to move somewhat close to the cottages. When Bill took me out to eat on my way home, I FOUND this town where I am thinking...THIS is what I imagine when I think of living "near the lake"...THIS town is about as good as it gets for me. (and the rent is REALLY cheap) But I feel things are meant to be or NOT and if this works out, fine, if not fine. THE big thing will be if I can get a job that pays decent to not leave me in debt over moving expenses. My old company has an agency in the next town so there is a good chance.
Living up there would be a nice thing to cross off the BUCKET LIST. If Bill and I get serious, that will be another thing.
What a beautiful story Kim. Sure hope it works out for you.
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