Signs that Say He's Just Not into You - Recognize How to Spot Mr. Wrong so You Can Make Room for Mr. Right
He Never Discusses Your Future or Makes Vacation Plans
Every guy has a life before meeting you. They schedule trips with their buddies, have guys nights out and are living the bachelor life. When a relationship is getting serious and has a future or is getting serious, he'll start talking about the things he wants to do with you, places to go together and makes plans to manifest those dreams. His buddies take up less of his time and he'll put you on center stage. If he does not even bring up future plans or where he sees your relationship headed, realize that this may just be a seasonal romance.
He Disappears for Days, Weeks or Months at a Time
This sign is usually self-explanatory but I cannot begin to tell you how many readers of my advice column find themselves in this predicament and think that he still is invested in their relationship and cares about them. Any guy that does not make time for you and pulls a disappearing act on you is not that into you, is seeing other people or is not ready to commit to one person. So, if you find yourself dealing with a guy who comes and goes from your life without a word, give him the boot once and for all and don't look back. Your time and energy is better spent on a guy who wants to stick around and be a part of your life.
He's Hitting On or Hooking Up with Other Women
If you've been seeing a guy for a little while and you are hearing rumors or catching him hooking up with other women or still maintaining inappropriate contact with exes, then you know he's not ready to settle down and choose you. If he's also hitting on your friends or asking you if your friend is available to go out with him, it's a surefire way to know without a shadow of a doubt that he's not interested in being with you.
He Does Not Call You Back the Same Day or Answers His Phone When You Call
When a guy is really into you, he does not screen his calls for your number. He'll pick up on the first ring or call you back within hours. When you see a pattern of days going by without a return phone call, you are not high on his priority list. Basically, you are being avoided. Another sign of a player or guy who is not invested in your relationship is one who never answers the phone in your presence. If you see his phone constantly on vibrate or you visit his place and his answering machine is set to low volume or mute, he's definitely still playing the field and chatting up new women.
You Never See Him More Than a Few Days in Advance
This means he is trying to keep his schedule open in case something better comes along. The classic MO of a player. A guy who's really into you will want to keep you off the market a week to 2 weeks in advance because he can tell you're a great catch and does not want anyone else to occupy your time. If he's never available on the weekends or occasions that are reserved as date nights, know you're just a passing phase or flavor of the moment.
He Shoots Down Your Social Invitations
This should be a clear sign to about 99% of women out there that he's not interested in getting to know you better or pursuing anything further. Trust me ladies, the first time he declines your offer to hang out you could give him the benefit of the doubt. But when it's many times in a row, he's usually not that busy, he just doesn't want to see you and is trying to be nice about it. If a guy is interested, he'll be happy to schedule a rain check or follow up with an invitation of his own. He's never too busy to make time for someone he really wants to have in his life.
The Emotional Signs
You've been dating for at least 6 months. He still can't say he loves you or wants to talk about his feelings in regards to you. If you have a guy who is constantly telling you that he does not love you, is not in love with you, is not sure how he feels and does not see a future with you after the 6 month mark, believe him. I feel that is a good marker of time for him to know where he sees this going and if he is developing strong feelings for you or loves you. When a guy is into you, he'll want to let you know how he feels when he is sure that you feel the same way. If he can't do that, start re-assessing what you are still doing with him