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Keep Laughing!

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Keep Laughing!

The Place to crack up! Laughing is allowed 24/7!

Members: 190
Latest Activity: on Wednesday

Discussion Forum

Battle of the sexes 207 Replies

Started by EddieDingo. Last reply by Aggie Sep 10.

Blondes, Aggies, Pollocks, Morons, Little Patsy, Lena and Ole 91 Replies

Started by EddieDingo. Last reply by Aggie Aug 28.

Child Chatter 24 Replies

Started by ozzieowl. Last reply by Aggie Jul 8.

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Comment by Tina on July 26, 2009 at 12:35am
Billy Did you save the puppy?
Comment by SeaRain on July 25, 2009 at 2:59pm
A day without sunshine is night.
On the other hand, you have different fingers.
Support bacteria. It's the only culture some people have.
What happens if you get scared half to death twice?
and the best:
Just remember -- if the world didn't suck, we would all fall off.
Comment by Billy Bones on July 25, 2009 at 7:41am
Funny Animals, Keefers Pictures, Images and Photos
Comment by MikeMoff on July 22, 2009 at 9:31am
A little girl asked her mother, 'How did the human race appear?'

The mother answered, 'God made Adam and Eve and they had children and so all mankind was made.'

Two days later the girl asked her father the same question.
The father answered, 'Many years ago there were monkeys from which the human race evolved.'

The confused girl returned to her mother and said, Mom, how is it possible that you told me the human race was created by God, and Dad said they developed from monkeys?'

The mother answered, 'Well, dear, it is very simple. I told you about my side of the family and your father told you about his.'
Comment by MikeMoff on July 22, 2009 at 9:02am
Last night, my wife and I were sitting in the den and I said to her, 'I never want to live in a vegetative state, dependent on some machine and fluids from a bottle to keep me alive That would be no quality of life at all. If that ever happens, just pull the plug.'

So she got up, unplugged the computer and threw out my wine.

She's such a bitch.
Comment by MikeMoff on July 22, 2009 at 9:00am
A couple drove down a country road for several miles, not saying a word.

An earlier discussion had led to an argument and neither of them wanted to concede their position.

As they passed a barnyard of mules, goats, and pigs, the husband asked sarcastically, 'Relatives of yours?'

'Yep,' the wife replied, 'in-laws.'
Comment by MikeMoff on July 22, 2009 at 8:58am
A man said to his wife one day, 'I don't know how you can be so stupid and so beautiful all at the same time.
'The wife responded, 'Allow me to explain.
God made me beautiful so you would be attracted to me;
God made me stupid so I would be attracted to you!
Comment by MikeMoff on July 22, 2009 at 8:57am
The Silent Treatment
A man and his wife were having some problems at home and were giving each other the silent treatment.
Suddenly, the man realized that the next day, he would need his wife to wake him at 5:00 AM for an early morning business flight.
Not wanting to be the first to break the silence (and LOSE), he wrote on a piece of paper, 'Please wake me at 5:00 AM .'
He left it where he knew she would find it.
The next morning, the man woke up, only to discover it was 9:00 AM and he had missed his flight. Furious, he was about to go and see why his wife hadn't wakened him, when he noticed a piece of paper by the bed.
The paper said, 'It is 5:00 AM. Wake up.'
Men are not equipped for these kinds of contests.
Comment by MikeMoff on July 22, 2009 at 8:50am
A successful rancher died and left everything to his devoted wife.

She was a very good-looking woman and determined to keep the ranch, but knew very little about ranching, so she decided to place an ad in the newspaper for a ranch hand.

Two cowboys applied for the job. One was gay and the other a drunk. She thought long and hard about it, and when no one else applied she decided to hire the gay guy, figuring it would be safer to have him around the house than the drunk.

He proved to be a hard worker who put in long hours every day and knew a lot about ranching. For weeks, the two of them worked, and the ranch was doing very well.


Then one day, the rancher's widow said to the hired hand, 'You have done a really good job and the ranch looks great. You should go into town and kick up your heels.'

The hired hand readily agreed and went into town one Saturday night.

One o'clock came, however, and he didn't return. Two o'clock and no hired hand. Finally he returned around two-thirty, and upon entering the room, he found the rancher's widow sitting by the fireplace with a glass of wine, waiting for him.

She quietly called him over to her.

'Unbutton my blouse and take it off,' she said. Trembling, he did as she directed.

'Now take off my boots.' He did as she asked, ever so slowly.

'Now take off my socks.' He removed each gently and placed them neatly by her boots.

'Now take off my skirt.' He slowly unbuttoned it, constantly watching her eyes in the firelight.

'Now take off my bra.' Again, with trembling hands, he did as he was told and dropped it to the floor.

Then she looked at him and said, 'If you ever wear my clothes into town again, you're fired.'
Comment by MikeMoff on July 22, 2009 at 8:44am
A cabbie picks up a Nun. She gets into the cab, and notices that the
VERY handsome cab driver won't stop staring at her.

She asks him why he is staring. He replies: 'I have a question to ask,
but I don't want to offend you.'

She answers, ' My son, you cannot offend me. When you're as old as I am and have been a nun as long as I have, you get a chance to see and hear just about everything. I'm sure that there's nothing you could say or ask that I would find offensive.'

'Well, I've always had a fantasy to have a nun kiss me.'

She responds, 'Well, let's see what we can do about that: #1, you have
to be single and #2, you must be Catholic.'

The cab driver is very excited and says, 'Yes, I'm single and Catholic!'

'OK' the nun says. 'Pull into the next alley.'

The nun fulfills his fantasy with a kiss that would make a hooker blush.

But when they get back on the road, the cab driver starts crying.

'My dear child,' said the nun, 'Why are you crying?'

'Forgive me but I've sinned. I lied and I must confess; I'm married
and I'm Jewish.'

The nun says, 'That's OK. My name is Kevin and I'm going to a Halloween party.'
 

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