TBD on Ning

This is completely just for laughs.... Do NOT think of posting anything serious or thought provoking here...EVER!






I mean it...... :-)

Tags: dead thread, key holder, roflmao, tickle me please

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A businessman met a beautiful girl and agreed to spend the night
with her for $500. They did their thing,
and, before he left, he told her that he did not have any cash
with him, but he would have his
secretary write a cheque and mail it to her, calling the payment

On the way to the office, he regretted what he had Done,
realizing that the whole event had not been
worth the price. So he had his secretary send a cheque for $250
and enclose the following typed note:

Dear Madam:
Enclosed find a cheque for $250 for rent of your apartment . I am not sending the amount agreed upon, because when I rented the place, I was under the impression that:
#1 - it had never been occupied;
#2 - there was plenty of heat; and
#3 - it was small enough to make me feel cozy and at home.

However, I found out that:
#1 - it had been previously occupied,
#2 - there wasn't any heat, and
#3 - it was entirely too large.

Upon receipt of the note, the girl immediately
returned the cheque for $250 with the following note:

Dear Sir:
#1 - I cannot understand how you could expect a beautiful apartment to remain unoccupied indefinitely.
#2 - As for the heat, there is plenty of it, if you knew how to turn it on.
#3 - Regarding the space, the apartment is indeed of regular size, but if you don't have enough furniture to fill it, please do not blame the management.

So, Please send the rent in full or we will be forced to contact your present landlady... (thanks Martha :)

Sailing is fun, but scrubbing the decks is aardvark.
-- Heard on Noahs' ark


lol...... that poor cat has neurological problems!!!!! 


Everyone seems to be in such a hurry to scream 'prejudice' these days...


A customer asked, "In what aisle can I find the Polish sausage?"

The clerk asks, "Are you Polish?"

The guy, clearly offended, says, "Yes I am. But let me ask you something.

If I had asked for Italian sausage, would you ask me if I was Italian?

Or if I had asked for German Bratwurst, would you ask me if I was German?

Or if I asked for a kosher hot dog would you ask me if I was Jewish?

Or if I had asked for a Taco, would you ask if I was Mexican?

Or if I asked for some Irish whiskey, would you ask if I was Irish?"

The clerk says, "No, I probably wouldn't."

The guy says, "Well then, because I asked for Polish sausage, why did you ask me if I'm Polish?"

The clerk replied, "Because you're in Home Depot."

that looks like something I would write on my IPhone.




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