This is completely just for laughs.... Do NOT think of posting anything serious or thought provoking here...EVER!
I mean it...... :-)
A police officer in Belton stopped a motorist who was speeding down Main Street.
"But, officer," the man began, "I can explain"
"Just be quiet," snapped the officer. "I'm going to let you cool your heels in jail until the chief gets back."
"But, officer, I just wanted to say"
"And I said to keep quiet! You're going to jail!"
A few hours later the officer looked in on his prisoner and said, "Lucky for you that the chief's at his daughter's wedding. He'll be in a good mood when he gets back."
"Don't count on it," answered the fellow in the cell. "I'm the groom."
Ian McMurphy applied for an engineering position at an Irish firm based in Dublin. A Texan applied for the same job and both applicants had the same qualifications and were therefore asked to take a test by the Department manager. Upon completion of the test both men only missed one of the questions. The manager went to McMurphy and said.
Manager: "Thank you for your interest, but we've decided to give the Texan the job"
Murphy: "And why would you be doing that? We both got nine questions correct. This being Ireland and me being Irish I should get the job!"
Manager: "We have made our decisions not on the correct answers, but on the question you missed."
Murphy: "And just how would one incorrect answer be better than the other?"
Manager: "Simple, the Texan put down on question #5, "I don't know.", You put down "Neither do I."
Okay, I had to read this more than once to understand. I must be having a slow day. FUNNY!