Who does better? - TBD2024-03-29T14:14:49Zhttp://teebeedee.ning.com/forum/topics/who-does-better?groupUrl=exhilarating-singles&commentId=1991841%3AComment%3A1438757&groupId=1991841%3AGroup%3A1401781&feed=yes&xn_auth=noI think the more financial re…tag:teebeedee.ning.com,2013-01-06:1991841:Comment:14405812013-01-06T23:05:25.239ZSerenityhttp://teebeedee.ning.com/profile/Serenity
<p>I think the more financial resources and stability one has the better they adapt after a divorce or death of a loved one,</p>
<p>I think the more financial resources and stability one has the better they adapt after a divorce or death of a loved one,</p> My first thought when I read…tag:teebeedee.ning.com,2013-01-05:1991841:Comment:14389862013-01-05T14:24:33.689ZMickchickhttp://teebeedee.ning.com/profile/Mickchick
<p>My first thought when I read this was - it depends on the individual, and I don't think it has anything to do with gender. After reading the first response, I thought, it's true that women, in general, seem to have a wider support system for their emotional needs, but that IS a generalization, and even if we do, after we get past the initial shock, if you will, of living alone, I think things would equal out.</p>
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<p>Whoever mentioned being an only child may have hit on something,…</p>
<p>My first thought when I read this was - it depends on the individual, and I don't think it has anything to do with gender. After reading the first response, I thought, it's true that women, in general, seem to have a wider support system for their emotional needs, but that IS a generalization, and even if we do, after we get past the initial shock, if you will, of living alone, I think things would equal out.</p>
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<p>Whoever mentioned being an only child may have hit on something, though. I was an only child until I was 7.5 years old and I learned, not only to amuse myself, but to enjoy times I was alone. Having said that, though, I don't know that I am who I am because of that, or that was simply my nature to begin with. I've lived alone for over 13.5 years now (with the exception of my dog/dogs), and I honestly don't know if I could learn to live with someone again. I've spent the past couple of weeks with company in my home and as company in my mother's home, and I was so crabby in having to deal with another human being 24/7 for so long I couldn't stand it. I was talking to a guy friend yesterday (who was widowed after 25 years and has been single for 5) and we were both talking about how hard it would be to adjust to someone else in our lives/homes. </p>
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<p>Don't get me wrong - I LIKE male company - I LOVE having someone to love. I just don't like having someone to live with 24/7, and if I had to make a choice, I don't know that I'd choose to live with someone again. I enjoy my space, I enjoy not having to compromise, I enjoy doing what I want when I want, and I don't miss having someone to cook me chicken soup when I'm sick. I'd rather be alone when I'm sick and feeling miserable! I do enjoy sharing special times, doing things together ... sometimes ... but it's not a necessity for me in the least. I have gone on trips and cruises by myself and enjoyed them, some more than when I went with someone else, because I got to do and see what I wanted to do and see without any hassle. On the other hand, I used to love traveling with my husband, but maybe that was because we were on the same page in what we wanted to see and do ...</p>
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<p>Bottom line - I think it's an individual thing that has nothing whatsoever to do with gender.</p> In my opinion I think it depe…tag:teebeedee.ning.com,2013-01-05:1991841:Comment:14389832013-01-05T14:23:37.082Zcarol machulskihttp://teebeedee.ning.com/profile/carolmachulski
<p>In my opinion I think it depends on the person and how they developed as social beings. Both my sons are single and the one with a mental illness has a very active social life with a strong circle of friends and the other one has a smaller circle and seems to spend a lot of time in bars. In my case, in my second marriage, although my husband had good household skills (I loved the times I'd come home from work and he'd cooked supper), as his COPD worsened, I realized that he'd never make it …</p>
<p>In my opinion I think it depends on the person and how they developed as social beings. Both my sons are single and the one with a mental illness has a very active social life with a strong circle of friends and the other one has a smaller circle and seems to spend a lot of time in bars. In my case, in my second marriage, although my husband had good household skills (I loved the times I'd come home from work and he'd cooked supper), as his COPD worsened, I realized that he'd never make it alone. His death was one of the times that I had a concrete example of a prayer being answered. So after nine years of widowhood, I'm still doing well and struggling to keep busy. Every so often I remind both of my kids that I'll not be here forever and so they need to work on their problem solving skills and that includes being able to survive alone. </p> Well there's always the excep…tag:teebeedee.ning.com,2013-01-05:1991841:Comment:14389302013-01-05T12:21:48.674ZZochitlhttp://teebeedee.ning.com/profile/Zochitl
<p>Well there's always the exception isn't there?</p>
<p>Well there's always the exception isn't there?</p> Could be. I get melancholy n…tag:teebeedee.ning.com,2013-01-05:1991841:Comment:14386422013-01-05T07:57:57.242ZCoconut Loverhttp://teebeedee.ning.com/profile/CoconutLover
<p>Could be. I get melancholy now and then, but it never stops me from going out to eat, going to movies or traveling alone.</p>
<p>Could be. I get melancholy now and then, but it never stops me from going out to eat, going to movies or traveling alone.</p> Aww, come on! I bug you every…tag:teebeedee.ning.com,2013-01-05:1991841:Comment:14389162013-01-05T07:23:26.426ZKarin M Fichtnerhttp://teebeedee.ning.com/profile/KarinMFichtner
Aww, come on! I bug you every other night or so. ;-)<br />
But you are right, CL......you are better at this alone thing than I am. Maybe because when you did share your life......you did it right. Once. The way it should be. "Til death do us part". I never had that, so I still wish I had a partner I could look back on fondly and know I once was loved. It might make the "alone" easier now.
Aww, come on! I bug you every other night or so. ;-)<br />
But you are right, CL......you are better at this alone thing than I am. Maybe because when you did share your life......you did it right. Once. The way it should be. "Til death do us part". I never had that, so I still wish I had a partner I could look back on fondly and know I once was loved. It might make the "alone" easier now. I don't know who does better.…tag:teebeedee.ning.com,2013-01-05:1991841:Comment:14389622013-01-05T07:20:15.248ZWoody Woodshttp://teebeedee.ning.com/profile/WoodyWoods
<p>I don't know who does better.....guys or gals, but as someone who has been single all of my life and have lived alone all my life, I can say that I've had a great life and have never at any time felt alone. I have noticed that some people who don't have a lot of friends, do feel alone...men or women. But those who have a good circle of friends who are active and do a lot of things.....they never seem to feel alone. And keeping busy, doing things that you like to do is also a way of not…</p>
<p>I don't know who does better.....guys or gals, but as someone who has been single all of my life and have lived alone all my life, I can say that I've had a great life and have never at any time felt alone. I have noticed that some people who don't have a lot of friends, do feel alone...men or women. But those who have a good circle of friends who are active and do a lot of things.....they never seem to feel alone. And keeping busy, doing things that you like to do is also a way of not feeling alone. Don''t stay in your house or apartment all day wondering what to do. There are millions of things out there to do. I can understand someone who lost a spouse or got divorced after many year of marriage, feeling alone. But time does not stand still....time marches on and so should your life. You don't have to feel alone. You have control of your life, you can accept 'feeling alone' and do nothing and keep 'feeling alone. Or you can take life by the b_lls and yell............"I will never feel alone again"....................Just my opinion.</p> I don't know many of you, but…tag:teebeedee.ning.com,2013-01-05:1991841:Comment:14389052013-01-05T06:56:26.854ZCoconut Loverhttp://teebeedee.ning.com/profile/CoconutLover
<p>I don't know many of you, but I'll jump in here. I also believe it depends on the person. I was married to my soulmate for over 35 yrs before he died quite suddenly. We did most things together, but we were not joined at the hip! We each did our own thing too. After going thru the stages of grief, I settled into life alone.</p>
<p>Maybe it's because I was an only child, but I don't need someone around all the time! I don't know any men IRL that live alone and are content about it. So…</p>
<p>I don't know many of you, but I'll jump in here. I also believe it depends on the person. I was married to my soulmate for over 35 yrs before he died quite suddenly. We did most things together, but we were not joined at the hip! We each did our own thing too. After going thru the stages of grief, I settled into life alone.</p>
<p>Maybe it's because I was an only child, but I don't need someone around all the time! I don't know any men IRL that live alone and are content about it. So far I haven't met any guys on sites of this type who aren't also on dating sites as well. That leads me to believe that - in general - women do better alone. I know many women on and off line that are content on their own.</p>
<p>One thing that concerns me is the fact that I can go for days without seeing or talking to anyone! That would not be good if something happened to me!</p> I think it depends on the per…tag:teebeedee.ning.com,2013-01-05:1991841:Comment:14388392013-01-05T06:21:46.235ZDee Holland Eidsonhttp://teebeedee.ning.com/profile/DeloresDHollandEidson
<p><em>I think it depends on the person. I don't like being alone . I have never been completely alone. My daughter and my granddaughter live with me.Plus the cat.It is so nice to have people around. I have a couple of very good male friends and female friends.We have game nights, BBQ's,also I work part time.I am comfortable.However I never turn down a chance to dine out or do something with my male friends.I enjoy male companionship very much. I don't believe I would ever marry again.I have…</em></p>
<p><em>I think it depends on the person. I don't like being alone . I have never been completely alone. My daughter and my granddaughter live with me.Plus the cat.It is so nice to have people around. I have a couple of very good male friends and female friends.We have game nights, BBQ's,also I work part time.I am comfortable.However I never turn down a chance to dine out or do something with my male friends.I enjoy male companionship very much. I don't believe I would ever marry again.I have tried three times.It works out much better for me this way.</em></p> I had a chance to live comple…tag:teebeedee.ning.com,2013-01-05:1991841:Comment:14386282013-01-05T05:15:12.709ZKarin M Fichtnerhttp://teebeedee.ning.com/profile/KarinMFichtner
I had a chance to live completely alone for about two years. Well.....not alone.....I had my Rocky with me. I had never in my life been completely alone. I have to say, it wasn't bad. Of course, my daughter and her family lived nearby, and if I got tired of talking to the dog, I could go over to her house and visit. My two granddaughters would pop inon me and visit from time to time. I got to decorate the way I wanted for the first time in my life. It occurred to me that I didn't know what my…
I had a chance to live completely alone for about two years. Well.....not alone.....I had my Rocky with me. I had never in my life been completely alone. I have to say, it wasn't bad. Of course, my daughter and her family lived nearby, and if I got tired of talking to the dog, I could go over to her house and visit. My two granddaughters would pop inon me and visit from time to time. I got to decorate the way I wanted for the first time in my life. It occurred to me that I didn't know what my style was; I'd been doing things someone else's way for my whole life. I liked creating my little nest. But my son got a divorce, and bought a big townhouse he was sick of rattling around in alone....so he asked me to come live with him. Mostly, I am by myself....but my son and new dil are there if I should need some company. Mostly, I stay down in my end of the house. I am joining senior groups in VA now, so I am meeting new people (lady-type people!) to hang out with. And I do have one close friend nearby. I am surviving. Would it be nice to be half of a couple again? Sure. But I would never live with someone ever again. I've learned my lesson!