TBD on Ning

Regrets, I've had a few.  But then again, too few to mention.

My "bucket list" is pretty short.  And some of the things on there (like spending the summer solstice in Reykjavik, Iceland) are closer to pipe dreams than bucket wishes.  Mostly I've had a life where I've mostly gotten to do what I wanted to do.  With few regrets.

One of the few things I would like to do before my bucket gets kicked is to fall in love again.  Head-over-heels, foolishly, gloriously in love.  Weak-kneed, breathless, astounded love.

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I have few regrets because early on I made a decision to stay home and raise children which I am glad I did. As a young girl I wanted to be a wild animal trainer, a missionary, a wife, and a mom. My greatest dream was to travel the world. I'm not sure when the dream to become a writer came about but its still there, I guess. I was greatly discouraged from being an animal trainer but no one could discourage me from loving animals and owning them.  This "LOVE" was passed down to my daughter who has owned, raised and rehabilitated TONS of small animals and was a Vet Technician until a bad car accident kinda put an end to that. For NOW anyway. SHE is actually in process of becoming a certified dog trainer.  I'm happy for her but its not something I really care about doing anymore. I "became" a missionary so to speak.  Right after I graduated high school, I went to Haiti. I went to Africa last year. As for the travelling, I'm greatly disappointed in my "Itineraries" so far. So maybe that will be my future goal is to "GO SOMEWHERE" I always wanted to.  I also have a little dream that came in the past few years...I would like to LIVE in a different culture/country than my own for maybe a year or so. Maybe a HOUSE EXCHANGE.

I would LOVE to meet and fall in love with someone  like some of you. It's funny...I think I have met the perfect person in several different people. Does that make any sense? Some people I can talk to for FOREVER, others make me laugh so hard, one  thinks exactly like me, one I enjoy debating with, some   another sang in the car with me driving through the desert but all those people gave me beautiful memories that I treasure. I WISH it was ONE person!!

Lynn....I like those I Love You "rocks"!  I had an odd "sign" on Sunday. Not sure if it meant ANYTHING at all but it got me thinking.... I was at a wave pool by myself and was laying on my towel, reading, looking at the sky and saw the FIRST heart cloud.  It was such a perfect cloud, I sat up and STARED at it. YES...DEFINITELY a HEART!! So I whipped out my almost ready to die cellphone but it was SO BRIGHT out, I couldn't even tell if I had the camera thing on so I said FORGET it. I thought, heck, I will never see something like THAT again!! After pondering WHAT it could mean for about 10 minutes, I got on my raft and back into the water. Within another 20 minutes or so, I was looking up and there again was ANOTHER 'HEART CLOUD". I have NEVER in my recollection seen a cloud in the shape of a heart...EVER!! So Of course, I'm thinking....Ahhh haaaa!!! maybe "THE ONE" is HERE!! I HAD been talking to a man earlier who seemed pretty nice (and pretty good looking too....LOL!!) but everyone else was pretty WAY below the age I am interested in. (I am 47 and  45 is about as low as I go...LOL!) So I said, Well, if I see a THIRD heart cloud, I am walking up and down this place through the 100 or 200 people and I'm NOT leaving till I  FIND my "soul mate" THERE that day but OF COURSE, the third one did NOT appear....

I would love to fall in love again.....but I'm a realist, and I doubt it will ever happen. They say there's a buyer for every house.....but I don't believe that any more.
So my bucket list items are.....a lobster dinner on the coast of Maine......a cruise to Alaska.......renting a car and driving up the West Coast....from San Francisco to Vancouver.......a couple of days in the Keys. Hopefully, I can cross one or two of them off my list before my time is through.

My thoughts run along the same line as Karin's. I think we are all realists here and doubt that love will come again into our lives, but we all (just guessing here) hold that small kernel of hope.

I hear many here, on other sites and conversations in general that they/we are too "stuck in their ways."  I truly dislike that phrase.  New friends be they male or female bring a whole lot of experiences, interests and energy to the table.  Why would one not embrace that!

As far as a bucket list, mine is written in pencil.  I've experienced many things that I would never have dreamed of putting on a bucket list, but somehow some great opportunities have come my way (many intentional-just made it happen).

So I guess it's a good idea to subscribe to the motto, "never say never."

Lefty girl...you are very right. Its funny because I have been on dating sites off and on for the past 4/5 years and though I have met some interesting men and had some fun times, I have not really found anyone I truly "connected" with even though their "profile" seemed PERFECT. (Maybe I am shallow but I ONLY responded to the good looking, perfect "for me" profiles. NOT that I am "ALL that great" but why SHOULDN"T I go for exactly what I WANT?!) They were honest and they were what they said they were BUT when I met them, SOMETHING about them got on my nerves. But as SOON as I kinda "all but given up" on the sites, I would MEET someone in REAL life that I have really gotten along well with and established a good relationship (one for 1 year and one for almost 2. Both of these men I still think of dearly but they both had past "childhood" issues (the same ones) they needed to deal with so we left as friends which I feel was better than trying to force a relationship that "ran its course". 

I don't know about you.....but I know, "Why not me?".  Every guy I meet anywhere near my age is either one of a handful of things......Either they have "been there, done that" and want nothing more to do with women......or they want younger women.....or they are trying to get their money's worth out of their Viagra prescription.....or they are stuck in a rut...."I don't like crowds"....."I don't want to drive that far"......"I don't like driving at night"......"It's too noisy"......"I don't like eating out; it's too expensive"......."I don't like going to the theater, or a museum; that's for wusses".......or "I don't like to go to movies; I'd rather wait until it comes out on video and rent it".  

Now......before you guys all get mad at me......I know all men aren't like that.  But it seems to be the only ones I run into.  It would be different if I was looking to snag one for a husband.....but I'm just looking for a companion to have some fun with.  I'll even pay my own way!!  But most guys I know would rather go out with their dog than with a woman.....any woman.  So.....I give up.  I will just find things to do by myself.  Or drag my poor girlfriend along to yet another movie she really doesn't want to go to.  And I'll take my dog along for my rides.  He's not much for conversation, but at least he likes to be with me.  

But it's their loss......because I'm really a pretty nice person.  I'm reasonably intelligent, I am adventurous, I have very eclectic interests, and, on top of that......I'm a helluva cook!  So.....Pfffft!  Hang it!  I'm done looking.  I'd rather wish for something more attainable.  

My bucket list for this year has a number of carry-overs like continuing upgrading my equestrian skills, work a bit at maintainng the Spanish & German I have already learned, keep trying to make new friends, but the new  ones are to take golf lessons, attend a riding camp and take another college course as a senior citizen auditor. The year is half over & only the last one may be achieved.

I want to see Ireland before I die.  I also want to live to see my grandsons learn to drive and make my sons crazy, like they did to me when they were teens.  I also want to see my granddaughter get old enough to date and watch her father (my son) meet all the guys at the door.  He won't want her dating guys like him.  :)  He's already said she can't date until she's 30. 

Karin...I found myself laughing at your post at the same time nodding my head....I've met those SAME MEN!!

If "Love was all you need", Phil, I wouldn't be on this singles board. I like the IDEA of it. Since my divorce I have had 2 very special men in my life (and some good dates along the way but not very serious). Everything with BOTH of them was wonderful, near perfect for I would say about the first 7-9 months. Its almost uncanny how similar these 2 men were down to their middle names being the same as my son's middle name. (Their unhappy childhoods were similar and they both had a lotta brothers) They both had several issues and no matter what I did, my love could NOT help them. WE broke up (in both cases) BEFORE things got ugly. I remained friends with each of them. Michael,  to my great relief got married a few months ago. Means I can permanently stop worrying about HIM. The other one, Mark is going through the exact same steps as "Michael". I can almost tell you how the "story ends". Mark and I broke up a couple months ago but I remain his friend as long as he needs me but if we get back, it will not be a good relationship. Its better THIS way. I NEVER regret resisting the urge to go back with Michael. We would have ended up hating each other and I don't want to EVER hate someone I once loved or even LIKED ALOT!!

Phil, I think what that means is we need more than just love.  Companionship and  friendship are very important things in a relationship.  We can get love from our kids, grandkids or pets, but a relationship with another human being gives us so much more. 

I believe there are as many kinds of love in the world as there are people.  You never love any two people exactly the same.  Even with my four children; I love them all.....but not the very same way.  Each has his/her own personality, and relates to me in his/her own special way.  I'd wager each of them would describe me in a somewhat different manner, because each of them knows me in a unique way.  I have been involved with several men in my life; some of whom I married.  I loved each one passionately.  I loved each one in a different way.  I treasure memories of all of them.  Each one has contributed something good in my life; each one has helped to make me who I am. 

I believe we all have something to give to each other.  It's the way God planned it, I think.  We are supposed to help each other become all we can be.  

I will never stop loving.  

Kooner, you're right, I love Karin's response too.  Phil, I think we all see "love" in different ways.  It's just human nature. 




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